Posted by johnLA on July 2, 2012, at 14:20:42
In reply to Re: @sls » johnLA, posted by SLS on July 2, 2012, at 13:22:22
At what age did you experience your first prodromal depressive symptoms?
Depressed mood
Melancholic thoughts
Suicidal thoughts
Insomnia
Irritability
Rage
Aggression
Anxiety
Loss of interest
Loss of energy
Social inhibition
Cognitive or memory impairments
Loss of sex drive
Loss of motivation
Dry mouth
Constipation
Blurred VisionHave you combined Abilify + Lamictal + Wellbutrin yet?
scott- really need to send you a bit of cash. no kidding. i suffer from some of the above. respond when and if you have the time and energy.
depressed mood; possibly in my early 40's. i had several minor health issues that added-up i believe to lower my energy. loss of smell being the biggest issue. didn't know it at the time, but this condition has a high-rate of depression associated with it. also, my solitude turned to loneliness after my last relationship at 44.
melancholic thoughts; when my brain switched one day after a final straw stressor in 2010. i was 47.
suicidal thoughts; within g a few weeks of that fateful day in 2010. never ever in my life did i even remotely think about suicide. a buddy of mine and i even made it a goal to live to 100! how arrogant and naive.
insomnia; again, started in 2010. i have had sleep problems due to mild sleep apnea. but, i always liked my sleep. and naps too.
irritability, rage, aggression; just not in my nature. no fights or arrests in my life. i've had a few 'melt-downs', but no yelling or physical stuff. in fact, i've been described as 'too nice.' this i believe is a big part of me not getting well. i was never a fighter, even though i was always very athletic (football and basketball) and pretty good at both. i think i need to find some 'fight' in me to beat this thing. again, don't think i have it in me.
anxiety; ah! now this where i realize i may have had a bit of an anxiety issue my whole life and just never realized it until i educated myself on mental stuff. very strong anxiety issues on my mom's side. as well as depression. no bi-polar really. but, many of my mom's side self-medicated their anxiety. but! i believe anxiety can be good if it is not debilitating. it kept me motivated and on my toes in many areas of my life.
loss of interest; 2 years ago at 47. that would be in all things. though again, i believe a mild depression may have been around for several years before.
loss of energy; i was still kicking *ss at the gym right-up to 2010. though once again, i was having health issues that were slowing me down; loss of smell, asthma, hip replaced, torn achilles surgery, back surgery. and, seemingly getting chronic bronchitis more and more as i got into my 40's. but, me being glued to my bed did not start until 2010, though i always spent a lot of time in bed. was my 'safe' place. read very much, in bed, before my depression started.
social inhibition; 2010 when severe depression started. though i was spending more and more time alone after that last relationship. movies alone, meals alone. traveling alone. but, spending everyday w/200+ teenagers really makes you like 'quiet' time.
cognitive/memory issues; never until 2010.
loss of sex drive; didn't realize it, but when i lost my sense of smell. early 40's. now, very low libido since 2010. by the way, this is the one item on bipolar tests that i check-off. i was always very sexually active. very impulsive in this area from teens to late 30's. though i did have a few long-term relationships where i was faithful. never married. big part of my depression.
loss of motivation; 2010 severely. again, possibly a bit earlier on a much much smaller scale.
dry mouth; 2010. only when i started psych meds!
constipation; absolutely never. :)
blurred vision; only when i spend many hours on the computer and i start falling asleep.
i have not tried that drug combo. i did try wellbutrin for a few days and my anxiety shot thru the roof. i was very energized. too much though. my face was bright red. my doc told me to stop after about 4 days. my new pdoc wants me to start on a baby dose of 37.5mg and slowly titrate-up. i might do that if my ketamine deal doesn't work. though i was on a pretty small dose the first time of wellbutrin (100mg) and really did not feel well.
he also loves abilify and continues to push that a bit.
i see him tomorrow. i'll ask about this combo.
my biggest issues right now are ruminating thoughts, suicidal thoughts, anhedonia, and no desire to get out of bed and out of the house.
so, am i bipolar and more importantly is there hope for me? ;)
again, that is quite a intake of info scott. please don't feel obligated to respond.
if you do, the check is in the mail like i said.
thanks again for your generosity.
john
poster:johnLA
thread:1020594
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20120630/msgs/1020698.html