Posted by katia on October 26, 2003, at 13:40:50
In reply to Barb-cat, Katia--I need help!, posted by fluffy on October 26, 2003, at 10:31:02
Dearest Katy,
I'm so sorry to hear about you severe depression. Are you able to work like this?
One thought - why didn't the doctors find a middle ground, like try titrating up slower on the Trileptal instead of all (1800mg) or nothing (back to 600mg)?> I'm so tired of this!! My other options right now are depakote and zyprexa. And I just don't care anymore. Just take me on the paddy wagon already.
* I know. It's so disheartening and exhausting, you poor thing. But I've seen a lot of strength in you that I don't think you're ready for the paddy wagon just yet! Depakote could work. Maybe talk about with your doc. Maybe even adding Dep. to the mix could help - or replace Tril. I'm really not an expert, these are just my thoughts.
Zyprexa is an anti-psychotic right? Maybe you need something more activating (in a healthy way?) Are you sleeping? If not, maybe Zyprexa could help or even Depakote. Are you lethargic now since stopping the Wellbutrin? Are you able to increase the Lamictal? that's an idea.
What other support do you have now? Friends? I remember you broke up with your boyfriend. I wonder if that triggered this new eposide. Not to say it wasn't a good decision (it probably was!), aside from that just any change at all for us sensitive creatures can trigger our moods to go out of whack.
I know drinking is such a good saviour at times, but it's probably best to avoid that now as it can spiral you down further (if you are drinking). Are you in therapy? My therapist has been great at just being there for me over the course of the past year while I've been dealing with ups and downs of mood and the hellish trials of all these meds.I'm sorry to hear that your parents aren't more supportive dear Katy. That hurts. A book maybe to get them is "When Someone You Love Is Depressed" It's an educational and supportive book for those on the other side of the depressed person that hopefully will enduce empathy and support. Maybe they just need a little bit of education from the outside, not necessarily from you as that sometimes hits too close to home.
That sort of "unempathy" and "advice" urks me to no end. It fuels such a fire in me that I end up surviving just on that fuel alone. It fuels the stubborn warrior in me.
There are people who understand and you're in a lot of darkness now, but it will pass and you will see again, I promise! Journal, take baths, cry cry and cry, paint, walk in the woods, near a beach, take good care of yourself and don't do more than you have to, even if that means calling in sick. Just ride this out and it will pass.
I'm here thinking about you.
Hugs,
Katia
poster:katia
thread:238206
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20031025/msgs/273659.html