Posted by lizbeth on May 5, 2002, at 9:32:30
In reply to I have taken some ativan and traz so less anxious, posted by janejj on May 4, 2002, at 23:42:45
> Thankyou for caring enough to reply. I have taken a couple of ativans and some trazodone, so feeling a bit more mellow now. I just want to escape myself, I am writhing around in agony from these feelings. I'm scared and I don't see the future. I know this is all supposed to be irrational thinking, but it is so real to me. I feel like I am dying slowly. I think i will stay in bed for 5 days until i can see the doctor and get my boyfreind to pick up some more ativans, Hopefully then this will all be over. Sorry, i don't want to bring anyone else down, sorry if I've made anyone feel that way.
>
> JaneJane,
Do not feel bad--that you're bringing anyone else down. A large number of us have truly been there. I am 31 and had my first major depression when I was 22. It was very scary in that I felt very alone--no one could seem to understand how pervasive, how grey my world was.
A very important thing to remember is that there is hope. You will find the right med, or at least something that will work better than the Prozac did. You may have to shift meds over the years depending on your situation, but that's o.k.
I resisted meds at first, went with a great cognitive behavior psychologist who helped a lot and didn't downplay the physiological things going on with me. Six months in, I finally gave Zoloft a try and it helped a lot (after being on both Prozac and Zoloft, I think it's a lot more mellowing than Prozac).
I'm now diagnosed as BiPolar II so I've added a low-dose mood stabilizer to the mix (first Depakote, now Trileptal which I like).
When you're feeling a little better, you might want to investigate "depression-plus" diagnosis's like BiPolar II. I'm in Chicago and have a great psychopharmacologist (a psychiatrist who specializes in tweaking medications) if you want the name. I would urge you to find a psychopharmacologist, even if you have to jump through hoops with your insurance or pay on your own. This one was my second--hold out for a really good one. He made the diagnosis of BPII and it's been a life-saver (literally).
But that doesn't mean that'll be you. You could just be a unipolar depressive, be on the AD for a year or so, gradually go off, and just monitor down the road.
On the meds note, I find Klonopin (do not use the generic, Clonezapam--for this med in particular, the branded name is scientifically proven to be better--it's a benzodiazepine like Ativan) to be very helpful. I take just 0.5 and it helps.
Hang in there,
Elizabeth
poster:lizbeth
thread:105113
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020503/msgs/105140.html