Posted by JahL on February 7, 2005, at 21:35:59
In reply to Re: Dear me! Now I'm growing a beard! » Racer, posted by SLS on October 30, 2004, at 9:01:40
Hi again.
Just thought you might be interested in this link: http://www.moodswing.org/trials/
It's the second study down that grabs my interest. In particular;
"It is hypothesized that stigmata of HPA axis hyperactivity and *cognitive impairment* will be predictive of response to antiglucocorticoid therapy with mifepristone."
You and I have, in the past, swapped tales of woe concerning Bipolar's ability to 'trash' one's intellect. My working I.Q. is about 40 points down from my 'euthymic', or normal score, and so I am mildly optimistic that I might be a candidate for a positive response.
As you know, the cognitive retardation component of Bipolar is a real killer, an eternal source of frustration and humiliation, and the prospect of having a brain that actually functions, at least to a degree (I'm not expecting full remission but you never know...), fills me with excitement (if it's possible for me to experience such an emotion).
Something's got to work for me soon because I've had enough of this hollow and empty existence and cannot rid my mind of this obsessive and graphic 'pistol-to-head' image.
I'm not looking to burden anyone with my problems, but it's odd. Other than to my psychiatrist, I very rarely talk to anyone about my suicide plans. Yet I can divulge my innermost feelings to a relative stranger (sorry :( ) before a potential audience of millions. Ain't life crazy? Am I?
Take away the quarrels and spats - many of which foment in my own slighty paranoid and so defensive psyche - and which given the nature of this site's members (i.e. we're all emotionally fragile to some extent. Angry too.), are entirely undertstandable - and I suppose I must find Babble rather therapeutic. I don't have a psychotherapist (and neither would I want one. I object to many of them on both medical and moral grounds) and I suppose, sadly enough, this site represents one of the very few opportunities to, er, 'vent'.
Thanks for listening (anyone).
Let me know if you wanna talk Mifepristone etc.
(a crushed) Jah.
> I think we all want each other to be as healthy as possible - in every way.
>
> - ScottAmen to that.
poster:JahL
thread:408472
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20041213/msgs/454709.html