Posted by Adam on December 13, 1999, at 0:14:02
In reply to Re: How I learned to stop worrying and love the pill.., posted by Bob on December 12, 1999, at 19:45:05
Bob,
I'm not even going to try to play Dr. Sex here (no pun anywhere inteneded), but there are
some things about your description of Viagra that still puzzle me. I never used it for
sex with another person, but it's my understanding that you take the pill 1/2 to one hour
before relations. I guess that ought to give plenty of time beforehand to, y'know, get
ready before the drug kicks in. It seems like there would be plenty of time to be tender
and affectionate. And then there's all the post-coital cuddling, etc. that give ample
opportunity to express deep emotion. I've seen people in movies gaze into one another's
eyes and weep for joy while making love, etc., but the reality of the actual act seems
less romantic and a little more carnal. Of course, I've never felt detached emotionally
with someone I cared for, and I agree I would find that disturbing too. But I can't see
how a bit of grunt urge isn't normal and appropriate. You know, lust? I've never felt
insulted by getting, you know, attacked.
> > I don't doubt that Viagra helps some with SSRI anorgasmia....
>
> Now, the thing that I *haven't* said is that while it has helped get my inner caveman out of his cave, it truly did nothing for those aspects of making love with someone you care for that require more desire and romance than grunt-urge. The body was quite willing, but I was still emotionally detached from the experience ... which truly horrified me and has scared me off from using the stuff ever since. No matter -- my partner still wants me to use the stuff because it pleases her just fine.
>
> Doug, Cindy: hate to put it this way, but I'm sure you understand when I say you're lucky to have partners who are as bothered by and concerned about your anorgasmia as you are.
>
> Bob
poster:Adam
thread:16213
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19991212/msgs/16793.html