Psycho-Babble Social Thread 616749

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Re: Hi all, update

Posted by 838 on March 6, 2006, at 19:03:11

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » 838, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 18:31:33

> Pleased to remake your aquaintance, I've been waiting for the right moment to say hallo to a fellow traveler. I come from a long line of '38's.

Really???

Well I'm the 8th of the 38's then so we can still be relations :-)

(kind of like being 'junior')

 

Re: Hi all, update » 838

Posted by LegWarmers on March 6, 2006, at 19:06:52

In reply to Re: Hi all, update, posted by 838 on March 6, 2006, at 19:03:11

> > Pleased to remake your aquaintance, I've been waiting for the right moment to say hallo to a fellow traveler. I come from a long line of '38's.
>
> Really???
>
> Well I'm the 8th of the 38's then so we can still be relations :-)
>
> (kind of like being 'junior')
>
>

Im 3/8 of an 8th confused ; )

 

Re: Hi all, update » LegWarmers

Posted by LegWarmers on March 6, 2006, at 19:22:36

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » 838, posted by LegWarmers on March 6, 2006, at 19:06:52


>
> Im 3/8 of an 8th confused ; )

I didnt mean to include the post above, that was just a statement about me lol

 

Re: Hi all, update » James K

Posted by Dinah on March 6, 2006, at 20:35:17

In reply to Hi all, update, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 17:00:53

Glad you're back.

 

Re: Hi all, update

Posted by Jai Narayan on March 6, 2006, at 20:43:40

In reply to Hi all, update, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 17:00:53

> I've been away from the board for a little while, but am back for the moment. I've been talking about going into a hospital, and after things got (or stayed) intense, I really meant to. I called the intake midday Wednesday, and she said she would call me back. I was under the impression from our conversation, I would be contacted the next day. Well, I haven't really gone anywhere, and the phone ringer and machine have been on, and here I am. This is kind of a feeling hurter. I was in this place less than two years ago, and the head of the program said I was welcome back if it ever became needed. Back to the drawing board.
>
> But my spirits are good, I'm over a week off most of my meds, and going to find a way that works. Some of you asked about me, and that was a real good feeling. Thank you for that.
>
> James K

oh, James, what is going on???
you are waiting by the phone and no one calls?
You are a very special person and I hope that you will be safe and okay.
god, it's so nice to see your post.
Ja*


 

Hi James

Posted by Tanzanite on March 7, 2006, at 1:48:33

In reply to Hi all, update, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 17:00:53

Nice to meet you. My feelings kinda would have been hurt too. I am pretty sensitive. I will be keeping you in my thoughts. I am glad to see you back and hope that things will get better for you. Sending virtual good vibes your way. Whatever happens, we all are here for you.
Peace and blessings
Tanzanite

 

Re: Hi all, update » James K

Posted by AuntieMel on March 7, 2006, at 13:03:01

In reply to Hi all, update, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 17:00:53

Don't worry about the phone call. Phone back.

Whoever talked to you probably lost the sticky note - stuck on the bottom of her shoe or something.

 

Re: Hi all, update » AuntieMel

Posted by James K on March 7, 2006, at 14:43:41

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » James K, posted by AuntieMel on March 7, 2006, at 13:03:01

AuntieMel, and Phillipa, especially, you two have pushed and encouraged me to take this step, and maybe you've felt a little disappointed for or in me. Well, I think good news.

I gave my wife Ruth permission to call them today and gripe them out for hurting me and maybe putting me at risk. The admission lady was out of the office, and Ruth ended up talking to the head of admissions. Turns out I was approved a week ago. This lady just so completely dropped the ball his mind was boggled.

If you've figured out much about my personality in the 2 and a half months (is that all?) I've been posting here, You may have thought there is no way I'll go back there after they screwed up. Well I told my wife call him back and I will go in. Thursday was offered, but I have a doctor appt tomorrow, and this facility had a pretty strict list of what you can and can't bring, and I have shopping, cleaning, mental prep and pre cert issues to deal with. So we are shooting for Monday. This place has a very relaxed weekend schedule (to teach us about leisure time) so going in on friday makes little sense.

Anything could still happen. If you could remember, it has only been a short time since I was in an emergency room with my pdoc talking to their pdoc and nothing came of it. I've surrendured so many times in the last several weeks, I'm all turned around. this may be finally the real thing though.

I will keep everyone updated as I emotionally and physically prepare for this. It may be interesting on more than just a personal give a darn type way.

This facility is the real thing. If I work it, they have real help. Individual therapy, family weekend, DBT, real gym, Like in a hollywood movie. I almost got it when I was there before. I have hope and fear right now. Just have to maintain my cool and go along for the ride until I'm all the way in. Then work and relax, and meditate, and be open to things I've been shut to before.

My best friend (blood brother) and his wife sent out official pregnancy annoucement 10 weeks today. Family.

James K

 

Re: Hi all, update » James K

Posted by JenStar on March 7, 2006, at 16:41:38

In reply to Hi all, update, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 17:00:53

hi james,
I'm glad your spirits are up, and that you're working on getting help! I'm sorry the hospital is being so bad about calling back. I hate it when "scary" places like doctors/hospitals are not good at communication. It just makes everything more frustrating. I hope you are doing well.

take care,
JenStar

 

Re: Hi all, update » James K

Posted by Dinah on March 7, 2006, at 18:33:01

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 7, 2006, at 14:43:41

That sounds very promising. I really hope that it all comes together and works out well for you.

 

Re: Hi all, update » James K

Posted by milly on March 8, 2006, at 3:20:09

In reply to Hi all, update, posted by James K on March 6, 2006, at 17:00:53

Go for it James (any chance of reconnecting with your creative self whilst there? art therapy?)
milly

 

Re: Hi all, update » milly

Posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 10:08:21

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » James K, posted by milly on March 8, 2006, at 3:20:09

> Go for it James (any chance of reconnecting with your creative self whilst there? art therapy?)
> milly

---good point milly, thanks for that. If I'm going to start being the me I'm capable of, I need to let go of the angry childish oath I took to not be an artist anymore when I left college.

I let you all know more when the next definite piece is known by me. thanks all for the support.

and Hi, Jai.

James K

 

Re: Hi all, nagging » James K

Posted by AuntieMel on March 8, 2006, at 11:03:05

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 7, 2006, at 14:43:41

I know you well enough to know that you are good at procrastinating.

grin.

But - you will go when you are ready. Just please be ready soon, ok?

 

Re: Hi all, update » James K

Posted by fairywings on March 8, 2006, at 15:36:02

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 7, 2006, at 14:43:41

Sorry things were so miserably flubbed up James, I hope all goes well, and you get everything you need out of your stay.

fw
btw, i'm not much of one for rules, i probly would have gone straight to the director when the woman didn't call back - esp. since he welcomed you back anytime.

 

Monday morning, done deal » AuntieMel

Posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 15:45:05

In reply to Re: Hi all, nagging » James K, posted by AuntieMel on March 8, 2006, at 11:03:05

> I know you well enough to know that you are good at procrastinating.
> grin.
> But - you will go when you are ready. Just please be ready soon, ok?

---We got full confirmation of my admission, they faxed packing list to wife. They just aren't the kind of place where you can show up on the door step. I've got 4 days, 2 with my wife at home, to relearn how to us an electric razor, reposition and repot and give away some potted plants for ease of watering and care. Clear weeds and prune behind condo so I don't create jungle while I'm gone. Watch all the Daily shows and Colbert reports on the dvr. Put my records and cds away. shop for items. stay sober enough that these are good days for us, not bad. Fix my stomach and cfs the best I can so I'm not physically sick as much as possible.

That's not really that big of a list, I know, but even little things seem huge to me lately.

James K

 

Re: Monday morning, done deal » James K

Posted by AuntieMel on March 8, 2006, at 16:55:13

In reply to Monday morning, done deal » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 15:45:05

We'll see <she says tauntingly>

I've got your number if you don't. And don't think I won't use it!

 

Re: Monday morning, done deal » James K

Posted by Gee on March 8, 2006, at 18:10:59

In reply to Monday morning, done deal » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 15:45:05

You can do it. Good luck with everything. I'm sure it will be okay. You are so much braver than I ever could be

 

Re: Monday morning, done deal » James K

Posted by sleepygirl on March 8, 2006, at 18:51:07

In reply to Monday morning, done deal » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 15:45:05

good for you James. I'm hoping all the best for you. I hope it goes smoothly for you, and that you work hard and get lots out of it. Take good care of yourself. You know we will be thinking of you a lot here, and we'll want to know how it goes.
Be well,
sleepygirl
PS never forget to be an "artist" in some form

 

Re: Hi all, update

Posted by Jai Narayan on March 8, 2006, at 19:53:42

In reply to Re: Hi all, update » milly, posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 10:08:21

> > Go for it James (any chance of reconnecting with your creative self whilst there? art therapy?)
> > milly
>
> ---good point milly, thanks for that. If I'm going to start being the me I'm capable of, I need to let go of the angry childish oath I took to not be an artist anymore when I left college.
>
> I let you all know more when the next definite piece is known by me. thanks all for the support.
>
> and Hi, Jai.
>
> James K
hey, I love that artist...he's really good.
my best to you, dear James K and your wonderful wife.

I am holding you both in the light.
Ja*

 

Re: Monday morning, done deal » James K

Posted by milly on March 9, 2006, at 8:28:27

In reply to Monday morning, done deal » AuntieMel, posted by James K on March 8, 2006, at 15:45:05

That was quite a big list to me (don't beat yourself up if it doesn't get done you've got enough to cope with)So pleased it is working out and chuck some paint around if you get the chance.
I'll be thinking of you on Monday, how long do you think you'll be away?
milly

 

It's all ruined.

Posted by James K on March 12, 2006, at 13:28:48

In reply to Re: Monday morning, done deal » James K, posted by milly on March 9, 2006, at 8:28:27

I thought about going off the boards and pretending I went, just to avoid posting about this. I've told too many people and accepted their support and encouragement to just walk away without explanation like that.

Thursday, after I thought things were all straightened out with admissions, after we went over admin lady's head, I got a phone message from admin lady. I freaked a little. After someone f*cks you over, and you complain to her boss, you shouldn't have to go back to working with her. The bottom line is, to go into this facility, I have to talk to her some more, and probably do paperwork some more with her, and I am more likely to commit violence than be in the same room with this person.

The stories and examples on their website are such b*llshit, I can't stand it. I left her a message calling her a condescending liar and a bitch and telling her whatever happens now is on her head. Then I e-mailed the director of the program who I know, and told her that because of her coworker in the office, I won't be coming in. She lied to me, my wife, her supervisor, and she's about to lie to you. Congratulations, I get to keep my life savings and you get to keep a bad employee. I will not crawl or beg. ever. for anything. So I'm not mature or mentally healthy enough to go into their mental hospital.

I've been trying to come to grips with this and think it through all weekend, and I don't have any answers right now. I haven't hit anything, and that took a lot of effort when I figured it all out. I'm now about 2 and a half weeks off meds and feeling sick. I took a day and a half completely without alcohol just to see if I could do it. I'd let things go, knowing I was about to get help. Now I'm back to on my own. I'm so tired of this. I want a job. If I can get healthy this week, I'm going to go sack groceries or something. Anything.

I don't know what to say to those of you who have followed my stories as they've come along. Things have never worked out like this in my life before, and I don't get it. I'm no more angry or stubborn now then I was 10 years ago. I guess the world changed. I'll figure something out.

I'm tired
James K

 

((((((((((((((((James))))))))))))))))))) (nm) » James K

Posted by muffled on March 12, 2006, at 15:20:39

In reply to It's all ruined., posted by James K on March 12, 2006, at 13:28:48

 

Re: It's all ruined.

Posted by Jai Narayan on March 12, 2006, at 20:49:33

In reply to It's all ruined., posted by James K on March 12, 2006, at 13:28:48

> I thought about going off the boards and pretending I went, just to avoid posting about this. I've told too many people and accepted their support and encouragement to just walk away without explanation like that.
>
> Thursday, after I thought things were all straightened out with admissions, after we went over admin lady's head, I got a phone message from admin lady. I freaked a little. After someone f*cks you over, and you complain to her boss, you shouldn't have to go back to working with her. The bottom line is, to go into this facility, I have to talk to her some more, and probably do paperwork some more with her, and I am more likely to commit violence than be in the same room with this person.
>
> The stories and examples on their website are such b*llshit, I can't stand it. I left her a message calling her a condescending liar and a bitch and telling her whatever happens now is on her head. Then I e-mailed the director of the program who I know, and told her that because of her coworker in the office, I won't be coming in. She lied to me, my wife, her supervisor, and she's about to lie to you. Congratulations, I get to keep my life savings and you get to keep a bad employee. I will not crawl or beg. ever. for anything. So I'm not mature or mentally healthy enough to go into their mental hospital.
>
> I've been trying to come to grips with this and think it through all weekend, and I don't have any answers right now. I haven't hit anything, and that took a lot of effort when I figured it all out. I'm now about 2 and a half weeks off meds and feeling sick. I took a day and a half completely without alcohol just to see if I could do it. I'd let things go, knowing I was about to get help. Now I'm back to on my own. I'm so tired of this. I want a job. If I can get healthy this week, I'm going to go sack groceries or something. Anything.
>
> I don't know what to say to those of you who have followed my stories as they've come along. Things have never worked out like this in my life before, and I don't get it. I'm no more angry or stubborn now then I was 10 years ago. I guess the world changed. I'll figure something out.
>
> I'm tired
> James K

Oh James, you did your best.
You know we are heading toward a full moon on Tuesday and this whole month is mercury retrograde...
so some times the best of plans change.
Please keep yourself safe, breath and know we care about you.
My best to you and your wife
Jai

 

Re: It's all ruined.((((((((JamesK))))))))))))))))

Posted by milly on March 14, 2006, at 3:30:59

In reply to It's all ruined., posted by James K on March 12, 2006, at 13:28:48

I'm so sorry for you

milly

 

Re: Find another place » James K

Posted by AuntieMel on March 14, 2006, at 13:17:07

In reply to It's all ruined., posted by James K on March 12, 2006, at 13:28:48

This place isn't the only one in town, you know. If you want this, don't let anything stop you.

Put any stubborn streak you have to good use.


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