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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
I can't unwind. Two months of setting my own goals has made me oh so selfish. Everyone, to a person, greeted me at work with open arms and kisses. I was going to apologize to the vice president I'd hung up on in October (that prompted me to take a leave), but when he called in to the switchboard he was as ill tempered and condescending as ever, so I declined to do anything but Politely process his call. It makes me feel better to know that *I* have been able to change how I respond to this kind of negativity - it's his problem, not mine. It looks so easy written down: take it easy, don't take it so personally, keep your centre... it is taking me a lifetime to learn how to put these into a rudimentary, daily practice.
One day back in the office chair and my head spins with To Do lists, things to catch up on, things to inquire about, and a hope that I retain the peace I eventually found while working on myself full-time. Making my workplace self cycle off after 8 hours is still hard to do.
Overall it went well. I'm glad I was able to return. I value my relationships with the fine people I get to work with. I am still hard on myself about being deserving of their regard... but that's what therapy is for.
So nice to be home, to be back at work, to feel that my veneer of sanity has a few more coats of lacquer on it.
Posted by verne on December 20, 2004, at 20:58:09
In reply to Back at work today, posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
PC,
What's helped me in similar situations is to breathe and say quietly to myself, "I belong", or even, "You belong" sense I'm so empty I talk to myself third person.
"I belong", "I belong", I belong.
verne
Posted by jujube on December 20, 2004, at 21:43:01
In reply to Back at work today, posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
I am glad for you that things went well on your first day back at work. I am so scared of my own return to the office at the end of January. As I get closer to that day, I will look back on your post today for some inspiration and strength. I am hoping to start yoga classes after Christmas (now that my energy is returning). So, hopefully, that will help me achieve a sense of calm and centeredness prior to my return to work.
Congratulations, Partlycloudy, on the progress you have made, particularly in the past two months. You should be very proud of yourself.
Tamara
Posted by Wildflower on December 21, 2004, at 10:42:39
In reply to Back at work today, posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
I just returned to work too after a two month leave of absence. I completely understand what you're going through. You should be up and running in no time. Just remember to pace yourself and not take too much on after just returning. I've found it helpful to write down what I need to do, what questions I need to ask, etc. It feels really good when you can cross some of those things off.
Posted by anastasia56 on December 21, 2004, at 11:37:44
In reply to Back at work today, posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
congrats on the work you've accomplished on yourself! being at work does have the benefit of providing a sense of structure which i personally used to find reassuring.
anastasia
Posted by AdaGrace on December 22, 2004, at 15:57:16
In reply to Back at work today, posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
I'm proud of you as well, and I have confidence in you that you will make it. I wish someone would give me a hiatus. Perhaps a visit to a mental institution, I'd even consent. If it meant I could have some peace, some rest, someone to remind me to take my pills, someone to talk to where I didn't have to reschedule because I have to take someone somewhere to buy or pickup something or see some doctor about their toe hurting.
I really did miss you. I know it doesn't sound like it, but I did. I'm glad you handled your family visits well.
Ada
Posted by partlycloudy on December 23, 2004, at 7:30:06
In reply to Re: Back at work today » partlycloudy, posted by AdaGrace on December 22, 2004, at 15:57:16
I am so tired. It's not so much showing up for 8 hours a day as it is being "on" for that length of time. No office door to close. No one to talk to like I have here at babble. I keep to myself these days and feel a tiny bit safer for it. Let the world think I'm all better.
It's good to have the structure to the day that work gives.
It's nice to know my hard work is appreciated.
It's just hard to keep my happy face in place.partlycloudy having a mostly cloudy morning.
This is the end of the thread.
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