Posted by partlycloudy on December 20, 2004, at 20:36:38
I can't unwind. Two months of setting my own goals has made me oh so selfish. Everyone, to a person, greeted me at work with open arms and kisses. I was going to apologize to the vice president I'd hung up on in October (that prompted me to take a leave), but when he called in to the switchboard he was as ill tempered and condescending as ever, so I declined to do anything but Politely process his call. It makes me feel better to know that *I* have been able to change how I respond to this kind of negativity - it's his problem, not mine. It looks so easy written down: take it easy, don't take it so personally, keep your centre... it is taking me a lifetime to learn how to put these into a rudimentary, daily practice.
One day back in the office chair and my head spins with To Do lists, things to catch up on, things to inquire about, and a hope that I retain the peace I eventually found while working on myself full-time. Making my workplace self cycle off after 8 hours is still hard to do.
Overall it went well. I'm glad I was able to return. I value my relationships with the fine people I get to work with. I am still hard on myself about being deserving of their regard... but that's what therapy is for.
So nice to be home, to be back at work, to feel that my veneer of sanity has a few more coats of lacquer on it.
poster:partlycloudy
thread:432232
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041217/msgs/432232.html