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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by FindingMyDesire on September 29, 2009, at 0:05:05
Hi Babblers. Long time, no write - or read. I'm supposed to be writing for my therapy session tomorrow to try to explain what I'm feeling cause I won't be able to say it in person.
I feel for you, Daisym, in your post, "Need help understanding these tears"
But really I came here to read something like that and know that I'm not alone. All I do is take from this site so don't bother writing back unless you don't mind the totally selfish mood I'm in.
I'm just so angry right now I could bust. And I feel alone, despite my T's supportive response back to my 3 angry messages. And then I left her a crying one thanking her and telling her (in my most pathetic and unattractive way) how much I need her and love her.
And now I'll have to face her tomorrow.
Am I REALLY still going through this cycle with her????????????? After 3 years?????????????
I just don't want to feel alone. So, I'm poking around here...
REMINDER: NO TWITTERING, PLEASE
Posted by Daisym on September 29, 2009, at 0:27:05
In reply to Desperate and Angry, posted by FindingMyDesire on September 29, 2009, at 0:05:05
Abandonment issues are so, so painful. These old wounds show themselves as "go away, don't leave me!"
Knowing you are cycling doesn't always help you stop. But trying to identify just what exactly is driving you to the extreme can be useful. And the three year mark isn't all that significant. What is more important is where you are in the therapy and what you are working on. The triggers are likely those things - which drives the need and the scary feelings of never getting them met.
I do sympathize. I hope you can get the words out tomorrow.
Posted by FindingMyDesire on September 29, 2009, at 1:26:49
In reply to Re: Desperate and Angry » FindingMyDesire, posted by Daisym on September 29, 2009, at 0:27:05
Thanks so much Daisym. I didn't expect something from you. I didn't want your post to feel so used. But it was. I appreciate your sympathy and your words.
FMD
Posted by mmealltalk on September 29, 2009, at 16:39:31
In reply to Re: Desperate and Angry » Daisym, posted by FindingMyDesire on September 29, 2009, at 1:26:49
That feeling hasbmore to do with your past and current feelings of abandonment. I am eighteen years into therapy with current t,I've seen her since I was 14 and at 32 I still struggle constantly with this issue
Mel
Posted by onceupon on September 30, 2009, at 22:53:59
In reply to Desperate and Angry, posted by FindingMyDesire on September 29, 2009, at 0:05:05
Hi FMD,
I haven't been following babble too closely, so I'm not sure as to the details of your story. Just wanted to say that this:
"Am I REALLY still going through this cycle with her????????????? After 3 years?????????????"
resonates to my core. It's so *freaking* hard! A wise babbler (can't remember who, sorry!) told me when I was feeling caught up in a vicious cycle of self-judgment (specifically about my attachment to my therapist) that she had experienced something similar, and that the angst went way, way down when she was able to allow the feeling and bar the judgment. Soooo totally easier said than done, but I still think back on that and wonder about how I can allow myself my feelings without judging them so harshly. Haven't come up with an answer yet :) but just wanted to put it out there.
Hope you're taking good care.
This is the end of the thread.
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