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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Cass on August 4, 2004, at 18:18:18
I posted this on Social, and GardenerGirl suggested I post it here too...
Today I learned that one of the other congregation members at my church committed suicide. I didn't solicalize with him a great deal, but we had a good rapore, and I would call us friends even though things had become sort of strained in the last couple of months. We were in a church group together, and there was some conflict. He was sort of controlling and didn't like that we weren't always along with his ideas. He had stormed out of the group feeling unappreciated, and I think he was angry at us. Nonetheless, he was very friendly to me the last time I saw him a few weeks ago. He seemed fine although we didn't talk much. He was sort of a volatile person, but he was also very kind and accepting. He had some medical problems, but he didn't seem very effected by them. He looked healthy, and he was very athletic. He had a wife and small children.I'm really floored by this. I just can't believe he's dead. I never thought he seemed depressed. His personality was a little quirky, but does that mean someone's going to commit suicide? Did the incident in our group contribute to his suicide? Was he having family problems, money problems? I'm sure I'll find out more information in time, but right now I'm left feeling flabergasted and sad.
Posted by Shar on August 6, 2004, at 0:28:11
In reply to I got some tragic news **possible trigger**, posted by Cass on August 4, 2004, at 18:18:18
Cass,
Suicide is so shocking. I'm very sorry that your friend went in that direction, and I extend my sympathies to you as well. It's a hard thing to accept.You (and he and his children and family) will be in my heart. Right now, you are most important. Are you ok?
Shar
Posted by corafree on August 6, 2004, at 5:30:47
In reply to I got some tragic news **possible trigger**, posted by Cass on August 4, 2004, at 18:18:18
I'm sorry to hear this news Cass. Living has become a daily nightmare this past week and a half for me. Since I have borderline personality disorder, it is time to begin DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy). My therapist told me I had to be absolutely sure ??? I could go to both sessions a week, one w/ her and one w/ the group. Since my last doc w/ the God syndrome, whom I will no longer see, said I was noncompliant (It was becaue I was in the midwest watching my ather die!) That was one of his reasons for taking me off Klonopin. I was on six a day. Now, I am noncompliant. I AM missing appts., all kinds of appts. My anxiety level has gone way up, beyond what two Klonopin can even touch, and I can’t go anywhere and am agoraphobic. The system I’m in hasn’t even appointed me a new doc yet. I am either in physical or emotional pain constantly and suidical ideation is at its greatest. The will and the way are literally worked out. My therapist said that if I failed to comply w/ DBT it could be very bad for me. I am so undescribably scared and fear (I HATE FEAR) is ruling me. Still my fam of origin does not show that they care about my illness, as my father did. My children love me so much that they are even willing to let me go if I can no longer stand living. My caseworker says ‘don’t sabotage yourself.’ but I am. HELP! Please help me hang on. I don’t know how to go it alone anymore! I need you all so very much. cf
Posted by Cass on August 6, 2004, at 21:32:01
In reply to No One is Triggering Me, But My Own Fear!! HELP!, posted by corafree on August 6, 2004, at 5:30:47
Dear Cora,
I'm so sorry to hear you're in such an unhappy place right now. I'm glad you have the support of your children, but I don't think they need to "let you go." I think you have lots of life left in you. When will you find out who your new doctor is? Do you have any idea?
Maybe there are little things you can do to help yourself through this. Do you have any techniques, meditation, prayer, activities that can calm you down or quell your fear?
Take things hour by hour or minute by minute. Remember that you are getting through this, and that things will change for the better before too long.
Posted by Dr. Bob on August 6, 2004, at 22:49:29
In reply to Re: No One is Triggering Me, But My Own Fear!! HELP! » corafree, posted by Cass on August 6, 2004, at 21:32:01
> I'm so sorry to hear you're in such an unhappy place right now...
Sorry to interrupt, but to consolidate them, I'd like to redirect responses to Cora to Psycho-Babble Psychology. Here's a link:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040805/msgs/374907.html
Thanks,
Bob
Posted by Cass on August 6, 2004, at 23:01:36
In reply to Re: I got some tragic news **possible trigger**, posted by Shar on August 6, 2004, at 0:28:11
Dear Shar,
Thanks for your concern. This has been very, very difficult. I loved my friend. I had known him for four years. He was brilliant, childlike, witty, humanitarian, and he had lots of strong spiritual convictions. It kills me to think of the hidden pain he was in. I am very sad, but today I saw his widow and brought her some food that I prepared. We spoke for only about 5 minutes, but we laughed a little and cried a little, and it made me feel better to know I helped her a little bit. I made it clear to her that I am here to help her at any time.
I probably have a lot more crying to do still.
Thank-you.
Posted by Shar on August 7, 2004, at 22:42:39
In reply to Re: I got some tragic news **possible trigger** » Shar, posted by Cass on August 6, 2004, at 23:01:36
Posted by corafree on August 8, 2004, at 16:54:01
In reply to xoxo (nm) » Cass, posted by Shar on August 7, 2004, at 22:42:39
You too! It was 6 mos. since Dad died 8-2. It still feels like yesterday. If he were here, I know I would feel much stronger. One of my ex's said all men wanted me for was sex and I guess he was right. Even now, my most recent ex will help me out w/ something and expect an IOU. My Dad is the only man that other loved me, myself, my being, not my body. He asked my brother to look after his girls. My bro' hasn't returned a call to me since Dad died, or called me to ask if I am ok? My identity left when Dad left. Pray my bro' will come through w/ some support someday. Why it needs to be a man is because all the men that have loved me, or I guess my body, have left me. The grieving has lessened just a bit. I know I need a med adjustment. On same starting dose of Eff-XR as began in April, but not able to get a state doc to see me, ... til' next Weds. Do you think I should have been cut off my benzo? I am allowed 1/2mg Klonopin x4 a day for two more weeks, then none. My anxiety is immobilizing me, making it hard for me to move on. I don't know how to get through to a doc that I need Xanax. It is the only thing that works, I'm sorry to say. I know better than to use benzos re: suicide ... experienced in that. So glad to know 'you're out there'. OXcf
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