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Posted by crazy teresa on June 3, 2006, at 12:40:52
In reply to Request for punishment board, posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 11:27:08
Posted by curtm on June 3, 2006, at 12:51:16
In reply to You're requesting incivility? ;~} (nm) » llrrrpp, posted by crazy teresa on June 3, 2006, at 12:40:52
How about a birthday board?
Posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 13:01:37
In reply to You're requesting incivility? ;~} (nm) » llrrrpp, posted by crazy teresa on June 3, 2006, at 12:40:52
Given that punishment reinforces and supports my notion of myself as a bad person, as a person unworthy of happiness or satisfaction.
Given that this part of me is prominent, and real, and often inescapable, why should it be denied support?
This part of me finds civility repugnant and offensive.
This part of me finds hugs unbearable.
This part of me hates to hear people say nice things about me.
This part of me likes pain, and is attracted to suicide.
Yes, this part of me is the crazy part.
Why does the crazy part have to suffer all the kindnesses of babble?
Why does the crazy me have to be offended right and left by ((hugs)) and well-wishes and treacle?
The crazy me has been strongly tempted to lash out at nice babblers with offensive remarks, simply to be punished and blocked.
A punishment board would spare nice babblers from such misdirected expressions of inner pain and dispair.
A punishment board would satisfy the need for mortification, perhaps to the degree of removing the urge for self-injury and self-murder. Or, perhaps it would provide support and remove the conflict that exists when we make such choices.
We could protect it well "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here" Well, many of us have abandoned all hope. And why not? Why shouldn't we. It's selfish, to be sure, but "civility" says that our needs are less important than others?
-llrrrpp
der Geistesgestoerte
Posted by AuntieMel on June 3, 2006, at 14:15:14
In reply to It's more complicated than that *trigger » crazy teresa, posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 13:01:37
Babblemail me - and I will punish you.
Be as uncivil as you like. But you best include a real email in case you get blocked for rude babblemail.
Go ahead - I can take it and I'll dish it back.
Posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:20:31
In reply to Re: It's more complicated than that *trigger » llrrrpp, posted by AuntieMel on June 3, 2006, at 14:15:14
Posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:25:18
I feel heartsick. I feel dismayed. I feel disappointed. I feel confused. I feel sad.
Posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:32:17
In reply to It's more complicated than that *trigger » crazy teresa, posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 13:01:37
>>
I won't support the part of you that wants pain and suicide. Time for real life help I think. Call your therapist.
Posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:35:21
In reply to huge ABUSE TRIGGERS in this thread, posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:25:18
Posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:42:08
In reply to that would be the above thread (nm), posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:35:21
Posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 17:56:46
In reply to Re: It's more complicated than that *trigger » llrrrpp, posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:32:17
okay zz,
fair enough.
thanks for your input.
-ll
Posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 20:31:54
In reply to Do not post or babblemail me- AuntieMel (nm), posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:42:08
I'm sorry Zazenduck
I did not mean to offend
It was inconsiderate and terrible
I'm ashamedI'm sorry I started this thread
Some things are better left unsaid-ll
the rhyme makes it seem trite, but it's not. I'm sincere. (and disturbed. yes, I will talk to T)
Posted by Gabbi~G on June 3, 2006, at 22:24:44
In reply to Please check this post dr BOB (nm), posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:20:31
Aww
I think llrrps'post could have been taken a few ways, and I know Auntie Mel had no intention of being hurtful.
Posted by zazenduck on June 4, 2006, at 10:19:44
In reply to Re: Please check this post dr BOB, posted by Gabbi~G on June 3, 2006, at 22:24:44
>
> I know Auntie Mel had no intention of being hurtful.
>
but intentions don't count on babbledon't worry
I think we can all rest assured that no deputies will be blocked for 3 weeks
>
>
Posted by zazenduck on June 4, 2006, at 10:47:51
In reply to my fault » zazenduck, posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 20:31:54
Posted by sleepygirl on June 4, 2006, at 13:17:19
In reply to Request for punishment board, posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 11:27:08
What's the name of that organization in "The Davinci Code" that's all about self-punishment and self-flagellation?
Posted by llrrrpp on June 4, 2006, at 13:51:06
In reply to Re: Request for punishment board, posted by sleepygirl on June 4, 2006, at 13:17:19
> What's the name of that organization in "The Davinci Code" that's all about self-punishment and self-flagellation?
Opus Dei
The NYT published an interesting letter this week from an Opus Dei member who is a prof. in Houston.
I'm not sure if this link will work, unless you're registered on NYT (which is free, I think)
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/06/02/opinion/02fortunato.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
Personally, I prefer the infliction of psychological pain over physical pain. I only resort to physical pain as a last resort.
Posted by Tamar on June 4, 2006, at 14:25:23
In reply to huge ABUSE TRIGGERS in this thread, posted by zazenduck on June 3, 2006, at 17:25:18
> I feel heartsick. I feel dismayed. I feel disappointed. I feel confused. I feel sad.
I was also dismayed when I read it. There are some things I never find funny. This kind of joking affects me the same way as jokes about sexual assault or child abuse. I guess it's because of my own childhood background of excessive punishment, but somehow I just can't tolerate public jokes about it.
I'm sure no one intended to cause pain...
Posted by gardenergirl on June 4, 2006, at 16:44:06
In reply to Re: Please check this post dr BOB » Gabbi~G, posted by zazenduck on June 4, 2006, at 10:19:44
> don't worry
>
> I think we can all rest assured that no deputies will be blocked for 3 weeksGosh, thanks! I appreciate that vote of confidence.
gg
Posted by sleepygirl on June 4, 2006, at 17:13:54
In reply to trigger. Opus Dei » sleepygirl, posted by llrrrpp on June 4, 2006, at 13:51:06
Posted by Gabbi~G on June 4, 2006, at 19:08:45
In reply to Re: Please check this post dr BOB » Gabbi~G, posted by zazenduck on June 4, 2006, at 10:19:44
Posted by AuntieMel on June 5, 2006, at 8:33:09
In reply to Re: Please check this post dr BOB, posted by Gabbi~G on June 3, 2006, at 22:24:44
Thanks, Gabbi.
You are right. I wouldn't want to hurt anyone.
I really appreciate your vote of confidence - more than you know.
Posted by AuntieMel on June 5, 2006, at 8:40:43
In reply to Request for punishment board, posted by llrrrpp on June 3, 2006, at 11:27:08
It's no excuse, but you often make such tongue-in-cheek posts I was trying to respond in kind.
I really meant no harm. But I am sorry it hurt.
Posted by llrrrpp on June 5, 2006, at 12:48:20
In reply to Re: I'm sorry » llrrrpp, posted by AuntieMel on June 5, 2006, at 8:40:43
AuntieMel writes
>"It's no excuse, but you often make such >tongue-in-cheek posts I was trying to respond in >kind.>I really meant no harm. But I am sorry it hurt. "
Hi AuntieMel,
I know that I make a lot of tongue-in-cheek posts. Perhaps you had me figured for a court jester. That impression is fine. I also have a lot of serious posts too. Basically I alternate between sorrow and silly. That's me.So I try to be VERY explicit when I am concerned that something might be taken the wrong way.
This is my original post, which started the thread
Dr. Bob,
sometimes we want people to punish us and tell us how nasty and rotten we are. We need some support and help to push us over the edge. Can we have a board were we say awful things about ourselves and then people respond and tell us that we are even more terrible and wretched? This site is too warm and fuzzy sometimes.Perhaps as alternative to block or warning someone can be sent to the punishment board and be asked to post something that makes their inner child vulnerable
The last paragraph was a farce, but the first paragraph is completely sincere. All parts of us want validating, not just the kind innocent parts. The ugly parts want people to understand them too.
Sincerely,
-llrrrpphttp://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20060525/msgs/652332.html
please note, that I wrote that the "first paragraph is completely sincere". I don't know how to say it any better. I was in a very dark place when I wrote this. i knew exactly what I was writing, and I knew exactly what I was asking for. I knew it was uncomfortable.
So, I get your response, and I'm thinking, "Okay, I will save AuntieMel for a bad day. When I want it to hurt, I know where to go, and what to do." That's all I wanted. It's simple. Hard things are easier to do when you have some support, right? I was hoping that you would be there for me (for the crazy part of me). I think I was very clear in these two posts.
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20060525/msgs/652332.html
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20060525/msgs/652370.html
So, what will it be AuntieMel- are you reneging on your offer to support me? Are you still game? I need to know. I can't expect the crazy me to think rationally, so I like to have all the pieces in place before I arrive at the party.
yours,
-llrrrpp
Posted by Dinah on June 5, 2006, at 12:57:27
In reply to Re: I'm sorry » AuntieMel, posted by llrrrpp on June 5, 2006, at 12:48:20
I seriously doubt you'll find anyone here who will agree to participate in denigrating you. What you might find is someone willing to accept that part of you and care about it. Willing to listen and accept that it is part of you with reasons for feeling the way it does. And to empathize with the feelings behind the desire to hurt and be hurt.
But not to hurt you. Someone who can take the words that you are afraid will get you blocked here, and give back caring. Not give back more of those words.
Posted by llrrrpp on June 5, 2006, at 13:03:42
In reply to Re: I'm sorry » llrrrpp, posted by Dinah on June 5, 2006, at 12:57:27
Yes, Dinah,
I figured as much.Imagine my surprise when I got AuntieMel's response.
I don't know AuntieMel very well. I don't think she posts on my threads (or vice versa).
I've got a couple of places where I can turn to get that kind of support (that you mention above).
But nowhere to go when I shun support. Well, that's not true. I could go Google, and get myself into a lot of trouble. But to have a real live person. that would be special.
-ll
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