Posted by alexandra_k on June 28, 2018, at 21:37:16
In reply to Re: Are you okay scott? » Lamdage22, posted by SLS on June 24, 2018, at 21:29:27
I'm sorry to hear that you have been in a very dark place. I am glad that you seem to be past the worst of it now, though. Life issues are hard for me, too. Do you want to talk about some of what is going on for you?
Again, I am sorry that I wasn't more sensitive to you when you were going out of your way to try and help me, before. I get into a place, sometimes, where I am a bit like a dog with a bone, or something, with respect to needing to understand some particular thing...
I have come to realise that (after all these years of not believing it) I really do genuinely believe that all the people (myself included) actually do deserve to be healthy and to pursue our life plans etc. To have enough control of resources for those things to happen.
Most of my life I've been told that rights entail duties and who has duties to provide those things for you? But the government (in this country, at least) provisions most of us. Itself included. Most of the country are public employees and the government does fix their salary and it isn't right that some people aren't given enough to properly meet their basic need. And as for the private people, mostly they, again, live off of government hand-outs for winning whatever contract they won. So when it comes to the base salary that people have that is fixed by the government. In these parts, anyway, it seems to me. And there really is enough for everyone's need. But not for everyones greed. And the trouble with some peoples greed has to do with some kind of depravity, often enough, where people get their jollies off of the oppression of others...
I don't mean that you do.
But I reckon that you (same as me) might have been blamed and shamed for a bunch of stuff over the years that really wasn't your fault.
I have heard (not sure whether I believe it) that depression is anger turned inwards. I think a lot of my mental distress has been due to my directing negative / hostile feelings inwards. That I haven't been particularly good at identifying the remediable and avoidable things that are opressing me... That could be fixed or altered by reasonable courses of action... Just that I lack the power to MAKE people do what is right...
Especially in these parts where those in power seem to think the idea is to dig in their heels and be belligerant for as long as they can because of the killing they are making... Which they thought was justified because 'it was only temporary'. Only their redistribution of resources... All the money they get in the name of redistributing it to others.. The leaky bucket amounts that are... Well, I reckon people are taking money from the public health system and personally investing it in the private health system. So it gets to the point the government will be forced to private contract out for the provision of public health services... And how will the public / private health services be allocated to different people??
I don't suppose it can be much of any worse than the way things are now, with our public system. They've run it into the ground over the years.
Anyway...
I guess I'm still working through...
But I hope you know that *you* deserve to be happy and healthy. I mean, I know what it is to go through a dark place... But I hope you know that I reckon you surely deserve to be happy and healthy. I think all people deserve this. But I think you are more sensitive and kinder than most.
Sorry, I'm ranting a bit. Just want you to know that I've been thinking about you and, again, I'm sorry about where I was at, before.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1099195
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20180212/msgs/1099334.html