Posted by Tabitha on June 14, 2009, at 1:19:03
In reply to Re: Balancing acceptance and change, posted by Deneb on June 13, 2009, at 21:33:31
>
> How were you able to separate your identity from your symptoms?
>It was a long process. Different things helped. Trying different meds, therapy. I had a vague memory of being a happy, bubbly child before my depression started. Maybe I was meant to be that person, and not a depressed young adult?
One thing that really took the blinders off for me was going to a face-to-face support group for mood disorders. I heard other people telling themselves the same excuses I'd told myself. "It's not an illness, it's just my personality", or "the world just doesn't understand me-- it's their problem". Somehow I could see it as denial in other people more easily than in myself. Then I got scared, and angry, that I'd let this illness find a comfy home in me for so long. I'd been tricked! This wasn't my sensitive nature or my artistic personality. It was not my friend. It was not something to accept. I could accept that I had the condition, but I needed to minimize its effect on my life, and find my true identity.
Starting to identify "the voice" of depression and mania was a help. Addicts do that-- they start to identify the voice of their addiction, and know it's a liar, and talk back to it, or ignore it.
It's scary giving up something that has seemed like part of "you" for so long. I don't think I cold have done it without a lot of in-person support and therapy.
poster:Tabitha
thread:900820
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090604/msgs/900906.html