Posted by Cass on March 20, 2009, at 20:50:01
I'm in an outpatient treatment program for depression and grief right now. Overall, I'm getting a lot out of it. I feel more open, less depressed and more supported. But there is an issue that's bothering me. We have a lot of group therapy, and there are a couple ladies in the group who interrupt A LOT when I'm speaking and when others are speaking. They ask questions, give unsolicited advice and make supportive comments, but, in my opinion, even saying something supportive is impolite if you're interrupting the person speaking. The way I've dealt with this is to mostly ignore the ladies interrupting me and to just keep on speaking. I usually have to speak louder to be heard, and just power on. Nevertheless, it's still distracting to be interrupted. Also, they are so forward about giving their opinions. I'm truly not there to hear their opinions, especially since they seem really screwed up. I often disagree with what they are saying or else what they are saying is beside the point. I am there to gain clarification about my own feelings and needs and to learn better coping skills. I feel that there's a certain level of arrogance in someone interrupting someone me the middle of my talk to give their opinion when I didn't ask their opinion. When other share, I try to listen respectfully and not to interrupt. It's "Do unto others..." And if I have a supportive comment, I wait until they are done sharing. As for my opinion of their situation, I don't feel my opinion is important, it is THEIR opinion that is important because it is their life. If I really wanted to add my opinion, I might say, "Would you like my opinion?" But I wouldn't assume that they wanted it. I feel that this is common sense. I wish the ladies could give me the same respect. The problem doesn't happen as often in groups led by counselors who are more structured, but it happens a lot in one counselor's group. Ultimately, I feel it is the fault of the facilitator. She should be controlling the group better. She facilitates quite a few groups throughout the day. As a matter of fact, I find that she interrupts people a lot herself, and then there are times when someone will finish speaking and she'll ask everyone their opinion of it. It just seems so unproductive, like a codependent feeding frenzy. There are counselors there who are excellent and have better control over the group, but it's just the luck of the draw. So I AM asking your opinion. What would you do in this situation?
poster:Cass
thread:886302
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090226/msgs/886302.html