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I had a drink tonight

Posted by Cass on March 9, 2009, at 22:22:25

I haven't had a drink in a month and a half. Tonight I had a Mai Thai. I'm feeling a very slight high. How amazing to feel this way. Since my husband passed away, I've had very few moments of lightness; mostly I just feel the weight of sorrow and incomprehension. I wish I could escape in some larger way and feel at peace. I had dinner with a friend who lost his wife about 5 years ago. We compare our experiences. I think we're a little different in our coping styles. I was telling my friend that lately I've been longing for some big transcendent, mystical experience. I guess that would be like an escape, just like having a drink except on a larger scale. Love is a big mystical transcendent experience.
My dog is having behavioral problems since my husband passed away. Every night she goes outside and barks. It's uncharacteristic of her. She never did that before. It makes me so sad.
Oh you guys, have you had any big mystical transcendent experiences? What were they?


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poster:Cass thread:884679
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20090226/msgs/884679.html