Posted by karen_kay on December 20, 2007, at 15:53:57
while you may think i stole this title from tim burton and pee wee, you are sadly mistaken. it came from my sad, warped, overstimulated, sick, runny-nosed, did i mention sick?, forgetful, and tired brain. sue me if you like tim burton. pee wee, i can think of other ways you can get your rewards.
now, on with the story...
duckie has wonderous adventures nearly every single day. whether it's waking up to naked mommy (HEY!!! you stay warmer when you sleep in the nude!!!! i swear! i'm not ruining my child! i'm not ruining my child!!!! and i'm not a hippie either!), by screaming, 'hey baby!' or projectile vomiting in his crib (he has been sick the past few days. and what has he eaten that's pink????? i swear i didn't give him pepto!!!), duckie has many wonderous and beautiful adventures!
he starts his day by watching mommy change (yes, he's seriously up his gorgeous mommy's rear all the time. in fact, i'm surprised he's giving me a moment to write this short (very short actually, he jsut saw me on the computer and came running) story.). while his gorgeous (did i mention how very lovely and wonderful his mommy is?????) mommy mommy changes her clothes, the duckie loves to walk over to her, gently rub her leg and say, in a way only an adult could say, "hey baby" i really think daddy taught the little duckie to do that move. it may come in handy for him when he's a teenage duckie looking for a breeding mate.
while mommy potties, the little duckie like to flush the toilet. not only does he like to flush the toilet, he also likes to unwrap all the paper from the roll and stick it in the toilet before flushing. not only does this clog the toilet, it also causes mommy to have to stop her flow of urine very quickly so as to not potty on little duckie's hand. poor duckie :(
little duckie also has many toys. however, he takes no interest in the fun, expensive toys that mommy and daddy duck buy him. he seems to like windows quite a lot. he likes butter knives too. he likes to play with windows AND butter knives. apparently, when you take a butter knife to a window, the sound is very appealing to a baby duckie. it's not appealing to a mommy duckie! it's downright painful. he also likes to play with baby gates. he knows how to open them. when mommy puts them up higher, he does the army crawl underneath. when mommy lifts them up just a little, so he can't fit underneath, baby duckie uses his useless drum toy as a tool to stand on, so he can open the baby gate and break free!!! baby duckie does have use for those toys afterall!!!!!
baby duckie likes to say "i love you" in sign language. however, when he says it, it sounds more like "ice duffs boo". he does have the hand gestures down though! and he also points at people and says "he did it!" or "she did it!" that works great at steak and shake, when total strangers are pointed out for no apparent reason and duckie says "he did it!!!!"
baby duckie is very messy, always has a runny nose, likes to head butt (especially when you're not expecting it, like when you're going in for a kiss!!!), still grabs mommie's legs and walks with her, and is the best thing in the world (especially when he hangs the phone up when mommie's talking to grandma!!!)
everyone should have a duckie! actually, anyone want one? mommy wants to go out :) he'll hand you your shoes, put them up for you, get his own diaper out, loves to play with plug-ins (added bonus if you're looking to cash in on your home insurance polilcy!!!!), and gives hugs, kisses, high fives (ok, he actually takes five, but with his mom, what do you expect?), and says juice plain as day!
i think mister bean may be his father!
poster:karen_kay
thread:801797
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20071130/msgs/801797.html