Posted by zenhussy on December 11, 2007, at 15:53:55
In reply to Re: thanks for askin' Kath and TexasChic... » zenhussy, posted by Kath on December 10, 2007, at 20:13:24
>>>What stocking post?<<<
this one: http://preview.tinyurl.com/yrfj69
was feeling oh so woe back then. was on lamotrigine and made us dumber than a bag of doorknobs. was in poor health and it was first holiday after several years of relationship.
looking back now can see how fortunate we were and still are even w/ this year being the first w/o ma. much improvement in areas of meds and therapy since '03. lots of hard work, many long painful to endure med trials and adjustments. years of chipping away at the layers in therapy and sticking w/ it even when most wanting to run.
>>>It sounds like you're gently accepting your grieving as it's evolving & accepting yourself exactly 'where you are'. I am glad about that. It's really important to be SO gentle & accepting of ourselves at a time like this.<<<it is a struggle but one that is quite obvious in its overwhelm. disease and disorder have taught us to choose battles over the years and this is one we know we'll not win. there is no fight here rather the challenge to release and allow...accept. so much more easily written than practiced.
>>>I remember years ago having a miscarriage - a very early one, but I was devastated. My then-husband, after a few weeks sort of said, "So how long are you going to go on like this?" - Sort of 'when are you going to snap out of this?
I am still pleased to remember 'snapping out of' my normal mousey way of 'being' & saying that I'd take precisely however long I needed to grieve in whatever dammed way I happened to do it!!!<<<so sorry for your loss but hot damn what a great response you gave!
trying hard not to place timeframe on grief. such a strangely different place than in the grips of depression and distorted thoughts from depression. grief is its own weirdness.
poster:zenhussy
thread:794822
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20071130/msgs/800176.html