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Re: not wanting children...can anyone relate? » saturn

Posted by Kath on June 15, 2006, at 20:23:14

In reply to not wanting children...can anyone relate?, posted by saturn on June 15, 2006, at 17:20:57

Oh Yeah.

Confession time: well, er OK first..........

First of all, I love my children dearly & would NEVER wish them away.

OK Confession time: If I had it to do again I would not have had kids. I didn't give it much thought except that babies & little kids are cute & lovely etc. (blush at that - what a dumb reason to have a kid!!!!)

Anyway, one is 30 & very ill. One is 22, won't work, has a life revolving around drugs. I am plagued by worry about them.... I'm getting better at being ME & knowing that they're THEM & that their stuff, including their feelings are NOT MY stuff & I don't need to feel like I'd feel if I were in their situation.

BUT - it is a MAJOR stress for me. It is so awful seeing someone you love as much as a Mom loves a kid - seeing someone you love that much suffer. We never know what will happen to our kids. I may be awfully selfish, but I think I wouldn't have had kids.

Given that - I must reiterate that I love them to pieces....that's probably what makes it so hard.

Kath

 

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