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Re: uh, why did you stop your meds??? » alexandra_k

Posted by Deneb on October 9, 2005, at 0:33:34

In reply to Re: uh, why did you stop your meds??? » Deneb, posted by alexandra_k on October 8, 2005, at 17:22:22

> Has your mouth ever twitched before for any other reason?

I got twitching from Celexa and Zoloft. I don't recall twitching before the meds.

> Maybe it has but you didn't notice it...

Perhaps...

It's kind of strange, but it seems like the more I think about the twitching, the more I twitch.

> But sounds to me like he is trying to help you as best he can...

I don't think he really knows how to deal with me. He didn't give me any advice on continuing or stopping Risperdal. He basically told me that it is up to me...that I should stop if it doesn't help. I don't know if it helps or not. He said I should be able to tell by now because 2 weeks is more than enough time for a trial. I think it decreased anxiety in certain situations. I'm just really bad at realizing the effects of drugs. Maybe I don't know how to pay attention to myself and the way I feel.

> >I don't think he can tell the difference between crazy thoughts and a crazy imagination.
>
> Can you tell the difference?
> I'm not sure that I can...

Me neither. It's just all really confusing. I really don't know what is up with me. I basically told my p-doc the same thing...I don't know what is wrong...you figure it out, 'cause I can't. Sometimes I feel like I'm faking things or something, but then why would I fake things when I'm by myself? Why would I not be able to control my thoughts? Why would I get so very upset? My suffering is real, for whatever reason, I don't know...

> I didn't think the meds were about 'crazy' thoughts / imaginings so much as your intense distress and the paranoid ideation that tends to accompany that.

My p-doc said they were for my "crazy thoughts." (my phrase, not his). He told me to exercise when distressed.

> But the only way to tell is to keep taking them and see whether there is a general improvement.

I really really hope it can prevent stuff like that from happening (the distress, the SI and weird horrible feelings). If I knew it would prevent them, I would take it.

Thanks Alexandra, for reminding me why I decided to take it in the first place.

I'm going to have another go at it. I really don't want to have another rope episode again because of a false belief.

Deneb


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