Posted by octopusprime on April 11, 2005, at 0:06:52
In reply to A Good Guy in My Life.....But?, posted by snoozin on April 9, 2005, at 16:20:35
snoozin, i dunno. i'm in the same boat as you. see my post on the relationships boat for details :p
here's my thinking on this:
in one sense, i've done a heck of a lot of work to be in a place where i can be happy. (in my particular case, i changed my medications, exercise regime, diet, job, country, apartment, and car, in addition to the whole guy thing)
so it may be that the guy is making me happy. or maybe it is everything else. and maybe the guy wouldn't be attracted to me if it weren't for everything else. so maybe it's the effort that i made (in advance of getting the guy) that's really making me happy, and the guy is the *just desserts* (if you will)
it's terrible in a sense, i'm having terrible anti-feminist thoughts of being barefoot and pregnant and cooking him a meal and being happy doing it. bleck. you work as a lawyer, i work in the tech industry, we're black sheep in male-dominated fields, we're almost conditioned to reject the traditional female stereotype of a maaa-yan making us happy. but it does. we're human. we like to be touched and loved. and there is nothing the feminist movement can do to deny it.
anyway, i don't know if my ramble is enlightening or not. but i think it's the work that we did to heal that made us attractive to others. and i think we are both reaping the rewards. it's not the man, it's you. the man is the reward.
yours in mental health
cheers
poster:octopusprime
thread:482075
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050408/msgs/482637.html