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Re: » anastasia56

Posted by Toph on February 10, 2005, at 15:23:28

In reply to Re: that gave me chills it's so romantic, posted by anastasia56 on February 9, 2005, at 23:36:31

> why is the house empty?

Mostly cause the kids are gone. Getting a puppy has helped. But mainly our lives revolved around the kids. We are alone together, ride together to and from work most days and seem to not say much to each other besides news of the day. The vessel of life seems empty.

> i don't know if you did or didn't instill confidence in your children. if you didn't, then you will have to learn to forgive yourself for that, just as so many grown up children here at babbleland have learned to forgive the things that have been done to them. forgiveness happens every day because it's the only way to get on with life and be halfway human about it.
>
I worry about them living a life of self-doubt like me. They're doing well so maybe this is an unfounded fear or projection. Let's hope so.

> You say your wife is nice...does that mean you love her? or does it just mean she is nice? if you do love her it sounds like behavior modification to try to eliminate your negativity is in order. If you don't care one way or the other, you can drive her into the ground by seeing the world in total grey.
>
I love her very much. She is a truely beautiful person even though she gave up social work to become a hospital administrator (sour grapes - she makes more money than I). If I drove her away I would have to become a hermit I could never find another person so kind.
Do you think behavior mod tx would help? What about work on core issues?

> i remember reading about the people you've helped. i know you are a good person who deserves a good life. you have to be the one that loves you the most first. then you have something to pass on to the next person, your wife. if you don't feed yourself, love yourself, you will have nothing to give.
>
> it all starts with you. i know you can be the one.


Thank you so much, ana.

 

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