Posted by JenStar on December 22, 2004, at 17:21:47
In reply to ARGH - another rant!!! Why does no-one understand!, posted by pretty_paints on December 21, 2004, at 13:56:15
hi Pretty Paints,
I'm sorry that people are being big dorks! You have a lot of courage for being honest and telling them what really happened, even knowing the kind of reactions you'll get. You are very brave! :) (heroic!)I have to admit that even though I mySELF have suffered from depression, still I have GIVEN the kinds of responses you wrote about. I thought about why I say things that seem to minimize the problem like "Oh, most people get better in a few months," or "EVERYone has depression these days," or "going out for a drink will help!" or something. I think it's because I want to convince the other person and myself that they WILL be OK in a few months, that whatever they are suffering from WILL get better, or that we live in a world where a friendly drink CAN help someone feel better. It might not be true, but I want to think it is, and that's why I sometimes tend to trivialize someone else's illness (even though I honestly am not intending to make them feel bad.)
Hopefully that's what other people are doing too - acting from some muffled good instinct, even though their intentions do a poor job of guiding their actual reaction.
Anyway, I DO think you're VERY brave for speaking up. I hope you have a great holiday!
JenStar
poster:JenStar
thread:432551
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041217/msgs/433005.html