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Psychic Psycho Babble request

Posted by rainyday on March 10, 2004, at 10:36:33

OK guys. Every time my spouse goes out of town I bury myself in booze - an alcoholic holiday, if you like. I despise this about myself - lying to him (he either has no idea or is afraid I will flip out if he confronts me), giving in, feeling remorse and incidently, like dying. The problem is, when I am by myself, I would rather not be present :(

Why can't I just be by myself without trying to run away from me? Who would want to feel so crummy and such a failure? AA is NOT a safe environment for me - I have gone from a meeting to a bar in the past.

Believe it or not, I am having a good day so far.


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poster:rainyday thread:322879
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