Posted by kara lynne on September 18, 2003, at 1:45:41
In reply to Re: The Ex Another Woman/ Susan, posted by octopusprime on September 18, 2003, at 0:26:14
Thank you. Keep those cards and letters coming. Actually, he first 'got clean' over a year ago (had to struggle through months of trying to figure out what the h*ll was wrong with him). But he has always been resistant--not that it's easy, but going through that first phase of recovery with someone is fraught with so much conflict. Denial, relapse, 'I can do it myself', '12 step programs are a cult'--yadda yadda yadda. Then he started going to quite a few meetings, but I think he even charms people there. He never did any step work, but he sure made a lot of friends.
I don't know what his motivation was in getting clean--or attempting to. At first he said it was for me, even though of course I knew it had to be for him or it wouldn't work. I don't see how, now that he's gotten a taste of recovery he could ever feel quite as nonchalant about going back to using all the time. I was so hopeful when he finally made the effort. But I guess you've got to have some motivation behind it or it's just more empty form lacking substance (no pun intended).
You know, I figured he'd just waltz right on into his fourth step and be on my doorstep with roses and an amends.
Boy was I deluded.
poster:kara lynne
thread:260451
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030913/msgs/261251.html