Posted by Eddie Sylvano on April 17, 2003, at 10:53:06
In reply to Au Contraire » Eddie Sylvano, posted by Kar on April 17, 2003, at 9:48:09
> The inconsistency is maddening. I don't get the daily swaying though. That must be the worst. Are you working now, Eddie? My God, I cant imagine. You know, it's bad enough when you aren't working. "Can you go to the movies on Friday night, Karen?"..."er, um..no. Maybe. Oh yeah that's cool. Sorry, i'm sick"! That's what I really hate about it. It's a little surprise when I wake up too though, because I've been cycling a little more. I'm glad drugs are evening you out a little bit, at least. What are you on?
--------------------Yeah, I'm at work now. Fortunately, I'm a programmer, and get to work in my own office in relative privacy. My productive days (when I have them, anyway) are productive enough that I can fairly easily make it through the off days. I'm glad my brain waited until this point in my life to flake out. I couldn't handle working at Kroger's or the university help desk like this. This also allows me to post here :)
Right now I'm just on 40mg Celexa, though it's efficacy is waning, I fear. I don't know what else would help, though. My main issues are with anxiety(?) (trembling, can't focus[mentally or literally], breathing shallow and quickly), mood (flat/morose/elated), and energy (usually none, sometimes intense bursts of). I fidget and rock my legs constantly, while sitting in tight, unusual positions. I also have nasty episodes of depersonalization (is this all real?). The world sometimes seems like it's happening "somewhere else," and the people in it know something I don't. I sometimes feel like crying (and do), though not sad at all. I love everyone and feel for them. It's as if I'm overwhelmed most of the time, and I've just learned to live with it.
Probably more than you wanted to know, but thanks for responding.
poster:Eddie Sylvano
thread:220028
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030414/msgs/220049.html