Posted by Dinah on January 27, 2003, at 22:39:05
In reply to fear of abandonment, posted by bpdzone2000 on January 27, 2003, at 12:09:40
No judgement here, but concern nonetheless. I really do think you should talk to your therapist about this. And perhaps talking about your feelings can help you keep from acting on them.
Have you ever read Deborah Lott's book, "In Session: The Bond Between Women and Their Therapists" ? It talks a lot about all sorts of feelings that clients have for their therapists.
Your therapist can help you discover the why's of what you do, and she can do things to help you with your fears of abandonment. I've got problems with abandonment issues as well, and my therapist always makes sure that his last words to me at each session are to call him if I need him. Somehow knowing that I can means that I don't have to, and it allays my not infrequent fears that I've done something during the session to make him angry with me.
My therapist was telling me today how glad he was that I felt able to tell him when something upset me or scared me rather than to keep it to myself and possibly act on it. I'm sure yours will feel the same.
So in my not terribly coherent way, I'm trying to say what others have said. The important thing is to discuss your feelings and behaviors with your therapist openly and honestly so that she can help you better.
poster:Dinah
thread:35845
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030120/msgs/35857.html