Posted by Bekka H. on January 9, 2002, at 21:03:18
In reply to Re: taking a break from your therapist?, posted by Mair on January 9, 2002, at 15:38:58
One of the difficulties I have with therapy is an idea that comes from law, and that is, conflict of interest. I think there is an inherent conflict of interest when the person who is supposedly there to help you, and help you identify and look after your best interests, is the same person being paid to do so. What if they are telling you that you need to attend so many sessions per week NOT because you need that many sessions per week, but because they are counting on maintaining a certain lifestyle and a certain level of income? Many years ago, I went to a psychiatrist at a clinic. He was employed full time there, and he was paid on salary, so he got paid the same amount regardless of how many sessions I had per week or how many years, terminable or interminable, I remained in therapy. He helped me a lot, and I think it was the best possible arrangement (i.e., his salary NOT being contingent upon how many sessions I had). Unfortunately, many talk therapists/analytically oriented therapists have only private practices. Even if they are affiliated with hospitals and have some hospital duties, their primary source of income is their private patients. I don't know what country you live in, but here in the United States, managed care has greatly cut into the incomes of talk therapists. Consequently, patients aren't exactly crawling out of the woodwork, and I fear that this might cause some unscrupulous, unethical therapists (and, yes, there are some unscrupulous, unethical people in every profession)to take advantage of the vulnerability of those of us in distress. Often, when we are most desperate and most in need of therapy, we are also least likely to be thinking in a level-headed, clear-headed, discriminating fashion. I am particularly opposed to the idea that one must attend therapy a certain number of times per week, and if you are unable to go two or three times a week, for whatever reason (like not being able to afford it, for example), some therapists will tell you you'll never "make it" if you can't attend that often. That's one example of unscrupulous behavior, not to mention destructive.
It looks as if your therapist behaved well when you told her you wanted to take some time off. I've known therapists to put up all kinds of arguments when their patients want to take a break, and I believe those arguments, however well disguised, are usually financially motivated, especially these days. Years ago, I had a friend whose grandmother died in China. My friend told her therapist that she would not be attending her therapy sessions for one month because she was going to her grandmother's funeral in China, and because the airplane ticket to that part of the world was so expensive, my friend decided to do some travelling around the Far East after her grandmother's funeral. She decided to go to Japan, etc. Well, the therapist told my friend that she would have to pay for those missed sessions!! Mind you, this was about 15 years before the advent of managed care. Need I say that my friend never returned to that therapist again? I doubt that could happen these days. Can you imagine submitting a bill to managed care for therapy sessions missed because you were in China, attending your grandmother's funeral?
In any event, I think it is good to take time off from therapy. Sometimes it is also helpful to go to another therapist to see if they can offer a different perspective, even if you decide to return to the "old" one. But taking a hiatus is good. It gives you perspective and helps you find out who you are independently.
poster:Bekka H.
thread:16539
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020102/msgs/16571.html