Posted by Simcha on August 2, 2001, at 9:16:20
In reply to Re: Losing friends because of sharing too much » dreamer, posted by Kingfish on August 2, 2001, at 8:40:51
Yes, I've found that it is important to share only certain things with certain people. This goes double when I am especially vulnerable.
As a sex addict (or sexual compulsive) it may not be appropriate to share everything with my partner who is not a sex addict. There is no way he could understand this disease from the inside out like I do. Some of my disclosure may even hurt him unnecessarily. I find that it is best to share this stuff with a therapist, pdoc, and my 12-step groups.
Also, it may not be appropriate to share my journey into meds with my partner either. He is not on meds... He does not have the same experience as me. He tends to look at meds as "crutches" and he tends to hold for the hope that someday I could be med-free. I wish that myself but coming from him it sounds shaming...like somehow I'm weak or wrong for being on meds... Again, with this stuff I come here, I talk to supportive people in my 12-step groups, I talk to my therapist and pdoc.
Some friends are good to share some of this stuff with and others are the wrong people to talk to about this stuff. My mother and father are the wrong people for me to talk to. My brother, who is on ADs and such and is a member of AA, is wonderfully supportive.
I have learned to be selective during this process. It's taken a lot of bruises in this area to learn who to trust. I guess it's part if being human.
poster:Simcha
thread:8550
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010731/msgs/8578.html