Posted by pegasus on February 9, 2012, at 8:58:01
I've been pondering this idea that sometimes our Ts seem kind of like prostitutes, in that they offer to meet a need that we'd perhaps rather get met in our real life relationships. And we have to pay them for it. I've had that thought myself, toward various Ts.
Today I was pondering why we don't feel that way about other professions that help us in ways we might like to be helped in our non-professional relationships. Such as child care providers, massage therapists, maybe even teachers. (There are probably better examples, but that's what comes to mind at the moment.) The difference seems to be the emotional attachment.
But, do people get emotionally attached to prostitutes? I wouldn't know, but I thought not. I thought that was part of the appeal.
So, what is it, exactly, that makes the analogy so compelling? It's the paying, for sure.
At first I thought it was also about the fact that we wish they'd be available regardless of the pay. That would make the relationship feel more real. And it seems sooooo important that the relationship feel real. But, then, that's not like prostitution at all, as I understand it.
So, maybe instead it has something to do with the fact that we can't get this need met without paying someone. Which is kind of humiliating. And maybe that's why it feels like prostitution. So, the feeling that it's prostitution comes from our end, not really so much from theirs (other than their need to get paid).
Because, I really do believe that Ts, unlike prostitutes, are very engaged in what they are offering us. They are committed to their profession, and to us as clients, and to the idea of helping people. Not only to the idea of making money. I think this is very unlike prostitutes.
Just thinking out loud here.
Peg
poster:pegasus
thread:1009801
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20111220/msgs/1009801.html