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Re: Any advise on male vs female for me as never g » Phillipa

Posted by Wittgensteinz on November 26, 2008, at 4:35:56

In reply to Re: Any advise on male vs female for me as never g » Wittgensteinz, posted by Phillipa on November 25, 2008, at 19:35:34

No need to be impressed! And yep, you've told me before about your husband, too :)

It seems you've had a string of bad experiences with therapists - from what you've said, they've tended to give you advice or tell you what's best rather than letting you decide that for yourself. Perhaps this says something about the type of therapy that would best suit you. I get the feeling you need someone who can just listen and help you to figure out how to help yourself - someone who's willing to get to know you before rushing into solutions. Being giving assignments to get out of the house or join social activities are all well and good but maybe you need to feel listened to and understood first. I get the feeling you have missed out on that in your life.

There are therapists out there who can listen attentively - who will remember what you say, your every word, who won't judge you or push you into quick practical solutions - I think what you need to do is have a good think about what didn't go well with your previous therapists. If possible make a list of the good and the bad things and try and find a new therapist who is able to work with your needs, who is flexible and open. If you can articulate your needs from the start, then hopefully you can find the right one for you - it might mean interviewing a view therapists but surely it would be worth it if you find another one like the one you had for that short while in the past.

Good luck!

Witti

 

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