Posted by DAisym on October 8, 2008, at 23:44:05
In reply to Re: My T made me really cry today » antigua3, posted by Dinah on October 8, 2008, at 23:09:45
Antigua, I love your therapist. Your post made me cry hard too.
I'm sure you've explored this but I have to wonder if you are punishing yourself with this pdoc somehow - I think Dinah asks really good questions. Working stuff through is very different than being retraumatized. This borders on that.
And yet, I keep wondering if you aren't looking to explode -- so that all the stuff that remains hidden will burst forth. And perhaps your pdoc feels like the right catalyst for that. He ignites things within you - recreating those feelings that you had with your dad, which definately presents an opportunity to do things differently this time. Including allowing a mom (your T) to take care of you.
I find myself furious at your pdoc for stealing away your writing. I also wonder what part of you the writing represents and why it needs his approval. I desperately want you to take this part back. Writing is in your soul and no matter what he says, your passion comes through in all your writings. "Screw him," I want to scream. Writing is like breathing - nobody can tell you to stop doing it. (I know, I know, he didn't tell you to stop.)
You are doing such deep work. I know it is hard, but keep going. You amaze me.
poster:DAisym
thread:856481
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081005/msgs/856524.html