Posted by Daisym on September 17, 2008, at 1:47:56
In reply to Re: wanting to cry but embarrassed. » Amanda29, posted by lucie lu on September 16, 2008, at 20:14:29
Amanda,
I've been seeing my therapist for over five years and talking about the csa stuff for 4 and new stuff still comes up. Right now we are doing a lot of somatic work - and it is super painful and embarrassing too - how stuff is remembered and felt by the body. Trying to describe the sensations is difficult -and I think I've shocked my therapist a few times, especially lately. He is shocked at what happened, but he isn't angry with me about it. He is pretty honest about how he feels when I tell him stuff - last week he knew that I was having a hard time with his strong response (stronger than mine) to a story.
But - he hangs in there with me. And eventually I usually get to the tears. Crying or not crying is your choice and either way - it should be how you want it. I understand trying to be strong, but you should also look at what the tears are telling you and why you are afraid to cry them. This might actually be part of the abuse memory - the fear of crying or the need to cry when you couldn't.
Keep talking about all of this. It isn't easy but it is necessary.
poster:Daisym
thread:852365
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080906/msgs/852412.html