Posted by Lemonaide on August 12, 2008, at 13:39:20
In reply to Re: Thinking about tomorrow's session » Lemonaide, posted by Phillipa on August 12, 2008, at 12:20:15
Thanks Phillipa for asking!
I had a very good session. We talked about my writing and how it helps me work things out in my mind so I can put it to rest. My poems are also a justification of the harm of the abuse or mistreatment I have received from others. All my life I had to be silenced from my abusers, I no longer willing to hold onto all the crap inside me because I am telling. I am telling everyone what happened to me.
Plus making it into a poem, creates what was so horrible into a thing of beauty. Even sad and angry poems can be beautiful because it is part of lives. He agrees my poems are very powerful and full of what I feel. He feels it is a healthy way to talk of the rage I feel in much safer avenues. In the meantime I found a new voice to communicate how I feel. Maybe I will someday put them all in a book, maybe with others survivors poems, and sell them for charity to help prevent child abuse.We also talked about the pattern of men in my life since I was a teenager or a client, who sexualized the relationship with me, one where I trusted them as a child. My T's relationship falls within this too. Even though I was a child and a client in these cases, what did I do or not do to for these relationship to create this. Was it my looks? I feel more comfortable being overweight so I stop getting the attention from men in public. Why do I feel so intimidated from this attention from men, I do not attract this attention by my dress or actions, plus I am overweight. What can I do to stop this. Then we talked about trust and our relationship. It was a full session and I am ready to continue.
poster:Lemonaide
thread:845615
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080810/msgs/845701.html