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Re: Letting myself be vulnerable, calling my thera » brassneck

Posted by Dinah on June 8, 2008, at 10:23:32

In reply to Letting myself be vulnerable, calling my therapist, posted by brassneck on June 8, 2008, at 9:01:47

I think the thing to do is to tell him more or less what you've said here. That you recognize that while you're reporting your feelings, you aren't necessarily connecting with them. You can tell him your fears that he'll be repelled by your misery or that you'll get too attached. And that (if this is accurate) you're afraid that once you open those floodgates, they'll be hard to contain to sessions and you wonder what will happen if you are overwhelmed between sessions. What are his phone call policies.

Or, if you aren't ready to say that much yet, another possibility might be to say that you've been reading about different therapy experiences and how different therapists are in their policies on intersession contact. And ask what his policy is on the topic. I've brought up any number of topics using examples from Babble, and he's always been aware that I may be asking for myself as well.

It *is* hard to be vulnerable. It's human nature to want to expose a bit of vulnerability, then wait for the response and process it, then expose a bit more. But in my experience, these discussions on where the boundaries lie, and what the expectations in the relationship might be, have been very helpful. I don't always like the answers, but we can generally negotiate a mutually acceptable way of viewing them - even if they don't change.

 

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poster:Dinah thread:833583
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080524/msgs/833593.html