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Re: No Hugs for me

Posted by earthmama on March 20, 2008, at 20:40:32

In reply to No Hugs for me, posted by DAisym on March 20, 2008, at 19:49:57

Oh, I'm sorry that you had to end the week with that. I know you "get" that it's his policy, but I still can see why it hurts. You two have a special relationship, and bumping against those limits is painful.

He says he shakes hands with his male clients. So, obviously, touching is not totally out of the question. Would just a touch make you feel better?? My T and I have touched fingertip to fingertip, and it definitely made me feel his "realness". Or does he have a "no touching female clients" policy?

I guess maybe the tough thing is that you are subject to any kind of "policy" when you've been together for so long. Your T does other things for you that are so special, though. Didn't he leave you a voice mail to listen to if you had a nightmare in the middle of the night? Maybe those are his "hugs" for you.

I know my T DOES hug clients, and it's sort of torturous for me knowing that it *might* be available - like, in what circumstances? And do I really want that kind of contact? And a million other questions that probably distract me from the "real" things I "should" be thinking about in T. So, there's the other side of the coin, I guess.

*I* am sending you a big hug! I know it's not even close to the same thing :) But I hope talking about this will give you some clarity and help you feel better.


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poster:earthmama thread:819091
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080226/msgs/819106.html