Posted by Maria01 on July 10, 2007, at 14:42:44
In reply to Re: whats worse for a daughter...., posted by B2chica on July 10, 2007, at 14:12:55
Yes, definitely address it before she is old enough to figure out what is going on. Really small children like your daughter get distressed when their routine changes, so if her routine is kept the same, even in times of distress, she will do fine. I think there is way too much fuss made over what happens in infancy, personally. Infants do just fine if their caregivers are calm and consistent, and if their routine stays the same despite outside influences. They are amazingly resilient. =)
You are right to want to address it now, so that by the time she does get older, you and your husband will have established a healthier way of discussing things. At your daughter's age right now, the only thing she will sense is your tension from the fighting when you go to hold her, etc. She will be calm if you are calm, but don't worry about being a bad mother. By virtue of the fact you are concerned for your daughter's welfare shows that you are doing a great job. We can only do the best we can with what we have. =)Your are on the right track.
Set those boundaries now, and you and your daughter will be much better off for it =)
poster:Maria01
thread:768554
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070628/msgs/768750.html