Posted by Dory on June 5, 2007, at 9:24:39
In reply to S.O.S. call to T @ 3am, posted by Dory on June 5, 2007, at 1:19:01
he called me back this morning and we had a good talk.. the guy is very helpful and i think he understands or "gets" the situation more than he might appear to. Every so often he says something that makes me see that he has a very good grasp on what my issues are... the advice and everything else about the conversation was good...and helpful. He struck the right chords. He is dead-on with the issues. But that soothing wasn't there.
The part that i am struggling with is that i cannot get what i need from him...is that true? or is it a defense? i honestly don't know. i do feel i need to *hear* him say certain things outloud, even if i know he gets it internally. i need him to address the distressed emotional side of me the same way he might if i were sitting there crying...because inside i am crying. i am trying to communicate this to him.. we are talking about what i want/need and the communication thing. i just don't know if he can do what it is i feel i need. It's not his natural approach i don't think. i mean, he's gentle and caring, but not warm and fuzzy. i *do* think he would be moreso if i were actually crying. So i don't know what to do. In the moment, when i am distressed, i am lost inside, crying and confused and in need of reassurance... i can't just ask for that in that moment.
i just don't know. Is it so wrong to want that soothing sometimes? To want someone to understand that you are crying inside and need that soothing even if you can't show that need?
One of my personal goals for therapy is to break through the thick wall i have built that separates who i feel i really am and the display me that i show the world... and that is going to need to have some intense emotional content.
*sigh
poster:Dory
thread:761151
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070525/msgs/761319.html