Posted by twinleaf on May 21, 2007, at 2:21:12
In reply to Re: The new analyst is really good!, posted by Fallsfall on May 20, 2007, at 7:46:18
Falls, if I remember correctly, you went to a woman therapist for about eight years, to whom you were very attached, but with whom there were some problems, too. Then you forced yourself out of that relationship, and made a very thorough search for a new one (how you did it is the Babble standard!), found a great male therapist- and then began to make a huge amount of progress- library degree and job, much more self-esteem (I hope I'm really talking about you, and not someone else).
I am beginning to see, now, that there were problems in my relationship with the first analyst. He was sort of seductive- not sexually- but in getting me to be extremely attached to him, and in kind of over-emphasizing my weak areas. The relatively healthy, well-functioning areas just weren't part of it. And there were far too many boundary crossings- he told me too much about his own life and feelings. I know that SOME boundary crossings are considered very important, but I think there were far too many in that relationship.
I'm feeling a little disoriented, having changed my name from Pfinstegg to twinleaf because of a problem in re-registering, but I hope I won't seem like a stranger.
The new analyst is very calm and attentive. At first, I thought he was a bit flat, but I think he was listening hard, and trying to decide if he could be helpful to me. Then, I think he decided that he could be, and the relationship began to form; I think it's going to be a much more balanced one.
There was a lovely boundary crossing when he left for a two-week vacation last Friday. He said, "I'll miss you."
poster:twinleaf
thread:755956
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070505/msgs/758541.html