Posted by vwoolf on December 22, 2006, at 9:18:29
In reply to 2 Therapists At Same Time » vwoolf, posted by happykat on December 20, 2006, at 19:38:58
Hi happykat
The conference was not a publishing conference, to be honest, although I have been to several of those too. I live in a developing country which was under a very reactionary racist regime until about ten years ago. A process was started after the change in government to give a public voice to anyone, on either side of the political spectrum, who had suffered torture or pain under the previous dispensation. Perpetrators were also invited to the hearings, where they were allowed to apply for amnesty for crimes they had committed. It was known as the Truth and Reconciliation Commission and the idea was to promote national healing. The conference I went to was a follow up after ten years.
Some of the victims were unhappy at the way their stories had been used for the benefit of a larger, public good, while they personally had found no catharsis or healing or financial benefit from the process. There were many sessions about ownership - who owns the story, and who should be allowed to benefit from it. They felt betrayed and helpless.
When you mentioned in your post that your therapist wanted to use your story, these victims came to mind. I know there may be a big difference, but the fundamental issue remains the same - your life, your personal history, what has shaped and made you what you are, being taken by another person for their purposes not yours.
The great care in therapy is always that the therapist's needs should be kept outside the room. Therapy is all about you. This is one of the reasons that therapists may not have sexual relationships with their clients, because then their needs would be brought into the room.
Publishing your story would satisfy your therapist's needs. I think you need to explore carefully what it might satisfy for you. I don't doubt that there might be some pleasure in knowing that you are so important, or have had such a bad experience, or such a remarkable healing, or whatever, that many psychologists would want to read about your case. But you are more than a case, and you should not have to be anything particular for your therapist to provide you with unconditional caring. I believe it would skew the whole relationship.
But then, I have strong views about these things. I hope I have not been offensive by insisting that you look after your own rights. You do, of course, have the right to allow your story to be published.
However what I am saying is something that is fiercely debated amongst therapists. There are many articles and papers on the topic - browse online and I'm sure you'll come up with a few.
Have I published my story? Yes, but I wrote it. And even so it was very hard, and I had to distance myself, so that the story doesn't really feel like me any more. I did it under a pseudonym which gave me some protection, but still there is a sense of exposure that is unbelievable.
Sorry this has been so long. I think I've told you a lot more than you were asking for. Possibly I'm trying to work things out for myself still.
poster:vwoolf
thread:715149
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061210/msgs/715650.html