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Re: Balancing therapy and life » Pfinstegg

Posted by Daisym on February 17, 2006, at 1:49:37

In reply to Re: Balancing therapy and life, posted by Pfinstegg on February 16, 2006, at 1:27:23

Thank you for sharing all that. I'm always surprised at what similiar tracks our therapy takes. The hurt I felt was more of a rejection than abandonment but his acknowledgement that I hurt him, and that the intensity of our relationship could reach such a painful peak was a bit devastating. And I was humiliated that *I* had pushed it to this point. And on and off angry with him for being so painfully honest.

It has been two weeks and we have talked a lot about how this rupture has effected both of us and our relationship. I was surprised when he told me how upset he was and how he was afraid I might run from therapy. And he worried about regaining my trust. It has been interesting because there have been two full sessions where I have shared very painful memories since then, and I half wondered if they weren't the easiest way to reattach. But as I read your response, it occurs to me that there *are* different part that need to trust him in different ways. So seeing if he can hear these terrible things might be a way of testing him...I don't know.

Can I ask another question? How did you arrive at cutting back? For me, if he brings it up I will freak out for sure. And everytime I bring it up. I make myself upset. Maybe it is still too soon. I had a flashback today that was scary and it wasn't something I'd seen before. So apparently there are still some new memories I haven't accessed yet. God, this really stinks.

 

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poster:Daisym thread:609357
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