Posted by shrinking violet on February 26, 2005, at 12:10:14
In reply to Re: silence » Daisym, posted by lonelygal2 on February 24, 2005, at 17:44:43
aw ((((((LG)))))))
As you know, I can relate a lot to what's happening with you in T. And my T also tells me (a lot) how much pain I'm in....I think she's trying to bring it out on the table and verbalize it for me, so that I can acknowledge it and look at it in my own silent way until I'm ready to talk to her about it. Perhaps your T was doing something similar. Also, the fact that she "sees" how much you're hurting, especially since so few people in your life know, can itself be comforting, do you think? Sometimes sitting with my T quietly helps a lot, because I think things can be said even if they aren't necessarily spoken, and sometimes the connection between two people can be enough to "hold" you through sometimes. I hope I'm making sense. It's good that your T seems pretty comfortable with silence (unlike mine, although she's trying; she gets through about five minutes now before she has to say something, but that's a lot better than before LOL). She also seems to understand that you are more comfortable not communicating to her directly right now, which is good, but it's important to not get too comfortable doing that, because when it gets taken away it's very hard (take it from someone who knows). So I hope you really try to push against yourself and talk to her, even if it's just one sentence at first. A little at a time, and hopefully you'll be more comfortable as time goes on. I'm not sure if you journal, or if you write your thoughts/feelings down at all, but bringing something like that to session and reading it aloud to her would probably really help as well. I know, it's very frightening (I've done it, and not just lists of thoughts, I mean whole detailed paragraphs) but it's better than falling into yourself too much and then not being able to get out (again, I know).
You're truly so brave. I hope you see that in you. Good luck.
Peace,
sv
poster:shrinking violet
thread:462409
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050225/msgs/463736.html