Posted by daisym on October 24, 2004, at 0:56:15
In reply to Re: I don't like these questions » daisym, posted by Skittles on October 23, 2004, at 15:26:08
The thing about my therapist is that he is gentle but persistant when he wants to know something. He believes very strongly that the relationship is the healing factor here, so he explores it with me a lot. He pretty much straight out asks things, like if I said I had a hard weekend, he might say, "why?" and I'll say somthing and he'll say, "did you think about calling me? Or would it have helped if we had been able to talk?" He often asks me if I was upset with him for this or that. Like when he got back from vacation. I tried so hard to be matter of fact, even though I had a horrible time for lots of reasons. He just looksed at me and said, "she's mad at me." (He was referring to my younger self.) And I just shook my head yes and we go from there. It use to be way more scary to hear him label those feelings than it is now. Not that it still isn't hard sometimes. I have to force myself to say outloud so much of what I'm thinking.
I have to tell you though, it was a huge relief to say, "I have all these intense feelings, most of them about you and therapy and I don't know if they are OK." His response was that not only were they OK, but they were expected and appropriate.
Risk telling your therapist. I'm betting it will be worth it.
poster:daisym
thread:406137
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041016/msgs/406536.html