Posted by Racer on October 14, 2004, at 13:04:59
In reply to Disordered behaviour (eating), posted by saw on October 14, 2004, at 2:38:33
Hey, Sabrina,
You say you don't meet the criteria for an eating disorder, but it's time to rethink that. If you're obsessing about food and your weight and the size and shape of your body, you do meet the criteria for an eating disorder. It may not be one of The Big Two (Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa), but there's also Binge Eating Disorder and Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified. ED-NOS is used for things like binging and purging, but not twice a week, or anorexia without amenorrhea.
Besides, the biggest issue is whether the disordered eating causes significant distress to you -- if it does, it's a problem, regardless of whether it can be identified in the DSM.
As someone who does have an eating disorder -- ED-NOS, because I do still get my periods, despite being about 68% of my healthy weight -- I will share some of what I've learned over the years. The biggest thing for me is that the eating is related to just that same brick wall between myself and my emotions that you described in explaining why you stopped therapy. The more I want to suppress my emotions, the more I repress eating behavior. I know, from past experience, that the only way to improve the eating/weight/body issues, is to improve my ability to access my emotions, so therapy is the number one priority -- even though there's a wall between me and the therapist and my emotions. Until I break through that wall, I won't be able to break the cycle of self-starvation. What's more, it's a vicious circle: the less I eat, the less energy I have for emotions, so the harder it is to access them. That's why I need the therapy to help me past this.
In other words, I'd suggest giving therapy another try. You don't have to think about it as a way of processing all your traumas, you can try a sort of band aid therapy, just to work on accessing your emotions, breaking down the wall between yourself and the experience of feeling. Then, later, when you're ready, you can decide whether or not to go into therapy for the traumas. Of course, it's likely some of those traumas will emerge during your initial therapy, but you can start out with a specific goal, communicated clearly to your therapist, that this is about getting in touch with your emotions, NOT the past traumas.
I hope that helps. And best luck to you.
poster:Racer
thread:402879
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041002/msgs/402987.html