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Re: Dreams » shortelise

Posted by Klokka on July 31, 2004, at 0:10:56

In reply to Dreams, posted by shortelise on July 30, 2004, at 20:31:57

My initial thoughts (total shot in the dark and probably super-obvious if anything is right, but here goes:)

Does the termination of your therapy feel forced somehow? Maybe there's a sense of being forced into something you're not comfortable with by someone who's supposed to take care of you? Do you feel as though you somehow can't reach out to your T anymore for help, even though it seems like you should be able? Just some random thoughts.

I can remember a few of my dreams, though only one in depth. This was back in February:

The dream starts with me crossing the street on my way to youth group. It's at night and the normally busy intersection is completely empty, and there aren't any lights on. I find this unnerving, but try and reassure myself that the church will be lit and full of warmth. I suddenly think that it, too, might be dark, and am terrified. I take a different route and find myself walking around the back of a massive, beaten-up basketball court - I'm upset that it is lit but nobody is there, and wonder about the state of the youth in the community. I hear a rustling noise as though from a nearby bush, think some kids are trying to be funny, and then suspect someone/something deeply malevolent is afoot. My efforts at self-control fail, I run, and my surroundings become nothing but a blur of corners and scruffy alleys. I suddenly remember that there weren't any bushes near the court and so I couldn'tve heard any rustling. I am again terrified as I question my sanity. After that I realize I'm dreaming, and eventually force myself awake.

I don't know when I had either of these, nor did I write them down:

I have a horrible day and go to the clinic to try and see my pdoc for an emergency session. He reluctantly agrees, but with two conditions: I am not allowed to sit on a chair, and it must be a group therapy session with my classmates. The session takes place, I find myself trying to figure out whether the focus on my issues is excessive, and the dream ends.

In the next one, I am sitting in the waiting room a few minutes before an appointment. I get very nervous and check a conference room adjacent to the waiting room to see if my pdoc is there, but he isn't. With a sudden panic, I realize that I forgot to run some important errand. This happens again and again until I am home and have ten minutes before the end of session. I try to convince myself to show up anyway, then realize it would be futile and break down sobbing.

I think I'm still a bit paranoid about showing up late to a session after that last one. I woke up Wednesday at 11 AM (had a session the next day at the same time) and could not calm down until I was 100% sure it wasn't the day, and even then I was a bit edgy about it. Do you ever have dreams which linger like that?


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poster:Klokka thread:372511
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040728/msgs/372547.html