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Re: T questions

Posted by Joslynn on July 18, 2004, at 20:06:41

In reply to T questions, posted by Asya on July 15, 2004, at 16:04:36

1.) My therp seldom discloses, unless it is to make a point related from her life that relates to mine I know she is divorced, but I don't know why. She got divroced before she became a therapist. (Oooh I do wonder why, what went wrong, did she learn from it, will this affect her advice to me, but Idon't ask.)

My pdoc/therapist, on the other hand, does disclose more frequently. Sometimes it helps. Other times, I don't like it, and I am trying to get better about gently letting him know it's not productive for me. Also he has this way of pontificating about relationsips in general in a somewhat cynical way and I am not sure if he is talking about himself or people in general? For example, I will talk about fears of never getting married, and he will talk about how marriage is not always what it's cracked up to be anyway. He will say stuff like, "often you realize your spouse has their own issues or serious disagreements but you realize these things when you are already married, when it's too late" or "even when you are married, that doesn't mean you don't have feelings for other people sometimes" and I always wonder, is he talking about himself, other clients, people in general, what? Who is this "you" person? HIM?! I don't want to know that.

I am just going to ask him next time. He is usually pretty open about accepting feedback and even criticism. I just don't want to feel like he is referencing his own marital problems in some oblique way, I mean, what I am supposed to do about that? Or am I being paranoid, just looking for a reason to know him off his pedastol? Or is the issue that my own parents used to complain about each other to me and it is a transference, where I am afraid of getting caught in the "confessor" role again when really the person is just trying to help me feel better about being single?

2.)Neither of them would call me to check up on me unless I requested it.

3.) I think combining therapy with meds is the recommended model, it doesn't have to be either/or.

well those are my answers.


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poster:Joslynn thread:366576
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040716/msgs/367517.html