Posted by Karen_kay on March 10, 2004, at 13:59:14
In reply to Re: How do you feel about your T's boundaries? » Karen_kay, posted by tinydancer on March 10, 2004, at 9:06:41
Bubba's questionable boundaries (and I think Miss Honey started that phrase.... Gee, thanks..)
Well, I'll start small. He always extends sessions. Always. I think in the past 5 months we've never finished on time, and in doing so I've kinda learned to play him. Perhaps if he would have held firm with the session length, I would have learned to face my issues at the beginning of the session, rather than the end.
He answers almost any question I ask him. There was one that he said he was uncomfortable answering, but I can't remember. I've asked him if he thinks about clients when he masturbates, I've asked him if he sits around the house in his underpants (to which he answered "I even used to clean naked"). Anything I want to know about him, I've asked. And for the most part, he's told with added information.
He called me once on a Sunday at about 10 pm to cancel an appointment due to a death in the family. Now, his secretary usually confirms appointments and mine wasn't until Tuesday or Wednesday. He also told me who had dies, where he was going, and talked for a few minutes which both intrigued and scared me.
These are a few of his infractions. I'm sure if you research, you'll find other things he does that others may disagree with. He used to frequently tell me I am beautiful, but I somehow brought it to his attention and he stopped. He also seemed to foster the feelings of erotic transference I had for him, saying that there's no harm in me having a crush on him. But, eventually it did go away (darn it, that was fun).
BUT, all of those "infractions" I feel, for the most part weren't counterproductive to the process. I'm much happier and healthier today then I was when I first stepped foot in his office. I wouldn't have thought even 3 weeks ago that I'd be so comfortable with going into group, yet I am. So, Bubba worked his magic yet once again. I don't know how that man does it, but he does...
Also, run if she expects you to pay. Now, if she invites you for dinner and offers to buy, I say go eat and order lobster. Could you also order some for me?
poster:Karen_kay
thread:322622
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040308/msgs/322948.html