Posted by zenhussy on December 29, 2003, at 1:38:55
In reply to Grief for the Dream, posted by shar on December 26, 2003, at 4:34:23
> I never thought my life would be what it is, especially after 'doing the right thing' for most of my years. It is hard to watch things crumble around me and not be able to stop it.
>SS,
Are you measuring up what your life was and is at this moment because of the 28th? I used to evaluate my life every year around my birthday. When depression is hitting again or doing its little dip thing of course you're going to think that things are crumbling around you. Are they literally? Is your ceiling caving in? Are you living with nature in your kitchen and attic? (like here with the rats in the attic and the yearly kitchen ant invasion due to a big rain storm)Have you spoken out loud just what your life is? You write "I never thought my life would be what it is" Have you written it down? Typed it out?
Doing the right thing makes you a good person in your heart. Depression distorts your ability to know you're that good person.
I don't have any pep talk in me as I'm going to take some time away (shhhhhh). Meds and therapy are much worse than I've let on. And bright screens of pcs and tvs are too harsh right now.
I'm going to lie down for a week or so. Will be thinking of you and hoping that your quiet new year is one of hope and love.
zh
poster:zenhussy
thread:293473
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/294224.html