Posted by lesley barrett on October 20, 2003, at 11:36:18
I lost my mother at the age of 3, thrown into an orphanage with my younger sister, my eldest sister went with my real grandma. fostered out after a while, never feeling i belonged and also filled the gap with many substances, trying to fill the void of a mothers love and also my lack of self love. my relationships were doomed to fail, i never felt loved enough because my needs were a childs need for a mothers love and no man can provide that. and i would stay in unhealthy relationships because i was addicted to the men, and also feared rejecting them as i would be opening up the wounds of loss and the pain was unbearable... to attach to someone how ever unsuitable and then lose them was like a death to me... but as i grew and understood myself and believed that i would survive the losses i became stronger, and also i stopped making wrong choices in men, as i did not kid my self that my love would always overcome everything.. if i loved them enough they would always be there for me...i now enjoy the company of men and have become more discerning, because i am worth the best... and so are you.
poster:lesley barrett
thread:271098
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20030903/msgs/271098.html