Posted by Lindenblüte on November 14, 2006, at 23:21:24
I've not gone to temple for a while. Have been reading Thich and some other stuff. Listening to Podcasts to get my Dharma.
Tomorrow I'm going to go to a real talk. I'm kind of excited, because before when I've heard talks/lectures/sermons (whatever you want to call it when a monk/enlightened one shares) well, it hasn't been in my native language. Or, it HAS been in my native language, but just barely...!
I'm kind of excited. I hope I'm courageous enough to go. I don't have a social group that participates in my faith. I don't even think most people are aware of my faith (I only became aware of it when I started listening more, and learning more... kind of like "yeah, that makes a lot of sense" rather than "Hallelujah, I've been saved".
My finding faith is kind of like a walk on a beach. at first the sand was so hot and unbearable. I thought I was in the desert. after a while, I look down and my toes are wet, and now I'm up to my ankles, but only during high tide.
I may never be able to swim, but a walk in the wet sand is nice. :)
Will I have the courage to stay for meditation? What if I feel like I'm a loser/faker? What if I feel that social anxiety that comes on sometimes when I'm out of my comfort zone.
Oh well. I hope high tide comes at the right time tomorrow?
-Li
poster:Lindenblüte
thread:703557
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faith/20060614/msgs/703557.html