Posted by Miller on April 5, 2003, at 17:09:14
In reply to Re: Dena » Miller, posted by Dena on April 4, 2003, at 21:34:16
It is good to hear from you. As for the Faith board, it has always run in cycles since I have been here. Don't worry, it will pick up again.
Dena, yes, God has answered me in a vary obvious way. Listen to this!!
This past week I was in a huge nobody-loves-me-nobody-cares-about-me-the-world-would-be-better-without-me depression. I had even started with my old tricks of isolating and cancelling appointments in preparation. My not-so-in-disguise saviour, my online shrink sent me an email that caught me off guard. (More on that later.) So, I emailed him and told him I am way too busy to correspond until after Easter. In my depression-warped mind, I thought if he wasn't in direct contact with me when I was found dead, he wouldn't be too affected. His response was that if I needed a break in communications, he could understand that, BUT, the break would not be with him and I. He said that he knew I have been puttin in long hours at work and I could take time from that.
After that response from him I kept reading and re-reading his message prior. Dena, it occured to me that he cares so much for me, as do so many other people that if I took my life, I would be creating heartbreak and hurt. I WOULD CREATE IT. Through his message I also read time and time again that God sent Jesus to show us how to live with real love. For his efforts we crucified His son. The most important way for me to change the hurt in this world is to change myself. I can't make people love. But I can be honest and keep trying to change myself until I am able to give to otherrs the things (emotions) I really want. God has given me the opportunity to correspond with someone who is both a psychologist and someone who understands my needs to reunite with God.
Now, as far as your need to maintain your balance on Easter, I will of course pray for you. However, if you have Faith, you know you will be fine. So, between our prayers and your Faith, you will be awesome.
Thanks, Dena for being such a comfort and reliable friend. I think good things are in our future.
-Miller
poster:Miller
thread:215857
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faith/20021227/msgs/216494.html